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Thread: GF advice

  1. #1
    tonystark88 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default GF advice

    Been dating a girl for about 7 months now two months it has been serious, before was casual but we were only seeing/sleeping with each other. When we are together it is great and we get along fine. She is from an eastern European culture so definitely a lot colder in general.

    I decided based on another members advice I was going to start calling instead of texting. Monday I told her basically I realize you have work, but if you can't meet you can tell me why, or if you have a minute in your week to send me some silly meme you can ask me how my week was. She said she got it and understood. I also expressed to her and she knows that I am busy too and have a life with friends and family, and don't expect all day texts or calls.

    She suggests meeting today on monday. We text throughout the week, but of course thursday night we hasn't even gotten back to me. I have to text her when I get off work at 12am. She suggests 11am-1pm to meet during the day, and I told her I preferred at night and that I do not want to have to wait until last minute to ask her whats going on. She ignores/avoids it and says how about 8pm.

    Chances are today she will ask me what we are doing. I understand the alpha mentality of telling her what to do, but we have been together a while, and while I always pay it would be cool if she took initiative. I don't expect based on her personality to be all lovey dovery 24/7 but not getting back to me is unacceptable. Especially after I told her this monday. It seemed like before she didn't understand why it would bother me, but she said she got it. This has been going on for a while. She suggests a future with me, and says things like I believe in fate with you,etc,etc

    I almost want to meet her today and be like do you wanna date or what, but I don't want to scare her off. I mean she doesn't cheat or act crazy, but I think how she acts is disrespectful. I guess I don't want to waste my time with someone who acts like they don't give a shit.

    Clearly I am putting more into it than her but she is the one who talks about the future mostly

    Advice?

  2. #2
    SerialSeducer's Avatar
    SerialSeducer is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: GF advice

    We are our own worst enemies. Sigh.

    Brother I have been where you are so understand everything Im about to say with that in mind. R E L A X. Why are you so possessive? Take your foot off the pedal. You are the PRIZE not her. You need to start living a life devoid of codependency. You act like you are gonna die if she doesnt text or initiate. You are NOT gonna die. You will get over it and realize she wasn't right for you. She will NEVER give you the respect you want if you don't respect YOURSELF. Stop texting her. Stop calling her. Stop CARING. and mark my words she wont know what the fark is going on. It will drive her crazy and she will be more annoying then you can handle. Careful what you wish for.

  3. #3
    tonystark88 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: GF advice

    I don't call her or text her often at all once every couple days.

    I am not possessive. I don't care when she goes out of town, or when she is with friends , or that she works. I don't thinking having a girl give me notice to a date she scheduled is needy. This isn't some chick I just met in a club yesterday.

  4. #4
    SerialSeducer's Avatar
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    Default Re: GF advice

    Quote Originally Posted by tonystark88 View Post
    I don't call her or text her often at all once every couple days.

    I am not possessive. I don't care when she goes out of town, or when she is with friends , or that she works. I don't thinking having a girl give me notice to a date she scheduled is needy. This isn't some chick I just met in a club yesterday.
    YOU DO CARE. You just dont admit it to yourself. You wrote a 500 word essay about how much you care. Its ok man. We HAVE ALL been there.

    My advice is to RELAX. Keep it light. Fun. (I know how hard this will be. I have gone into situations just like this with the same Mindset and eventually sooner or later i fucked it up and got serious and well... that was the beginning of the end)...

    the only other possibilty is that maybe, just maybe, you and this girl are not compatible. If she's perfectly ok with the amount of energy she puts in versus what you do and you are NOT then, face it, that doesnt bode well. You need to be with someone who reciprocates to the degree you like and vice versa.

  5. #5
    tonystark88 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: GF advice

    So should I tell her? I wrote all this not because I am "possessive" I don't care about the things I wrote. What I do care about is we kept it light for half a year and now she talks about future plans of moving in together and marriage. Not me .

    That's why I tell her this stuff. So my point is if you wanna make it serious make it serious

  6. #6
    SerialSeducer's Avatar
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    Default Re: GF advice

    Quote Originally Posted by tonystark88 View Post
    So should I tell her? I wrote all this not because I am "possessive" I don't care about the things I wrote. What I do care about is we kept it light for half a year and now she talks about future plans of moving in together and marriage. Not me .

    That's why I tell her this stuff. So my point is if you wanna make it serious make it serious
    My point is that she may very well be SERIOUS. But she's just NOT the type to initiate. And it doesnt seem like you are ok with that. If you aren't then maybe the relationship isnt the best one for you.

  7. #7
    tonystark88 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: GF advice

    That's fine. But when I do she has react.

    I guess I'm just trying to educate her a little, I think most other guys got mad and gave up but I see something good in her

  8. #8
    TPix's Avatar
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    Default Re: GF advice

    I think SerialSeducer has some good points. Fine dont break up with her but at least dont try to pretend these things dont matter to you. Some puas just go around using scripted stuff all over again and it seems so fake. Try to have the alpha mentality or admit what you´re lacking. Its good to fake it until you make it but dont make it ridiculous.
    Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not
    understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
    But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and
    recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before
    you and how fabulous you really looked….

  9. #9
    tonystark88 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: GF advice

    Yes he does and so do you. I'm just saying ok I get the pua science but I was looking for some advice more than just keep it light .

    It's easy to bang girls or casually date, and in a relationship you can't next when you have an issue. I am not calling her all the time or texting or asking always where she is. But when we do meet I want some freakin respect . Plain and simple


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