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Thread: drunk texting issue

  1. #11
    LAMEtext is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    great info & tips, thank you so much!
    I'm definitely going to think longer about every text I am sending.

    1. Where can I find more examples of good texts?
    2. If i'm suddenly changing my texting style, won't she find that odd?
    3. I know I'm looking very desperate now, so would it be better to just play it very passive when I'm in Prague?
    4. if I would be lonely, I have act like I have barely a minute of spare time?

  2. #12
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    Listen.
    You don't need examples of good texts. Examples are just going to be a Band-Aid to the bigger problem you have. We can't give you Band-Aids forever. All you're going to do is basically copy what we tell you, and be back asking us again what to text back to her reply.

    You're problem is you're clueless on how to text in a way to build suspense and attraction. You WANT her to be waiting for your texts, thinking about what you're going to say next. Sending thoughtless, friendly texts is lame and will get you no-where.
    Imagine how many other guys are doing the same thing? Yeah. Especially if she is hot as you say she is. She probably has 10 different chumps texting her the same meaningless friendly nice guy texts, and even if she doesn't, you need to think that way.

    You need to read I believe (Tmal's?) texting thread. Memorize it. Engrain it into your head. That's a terrific start.

    Then you need to stop texting so much. In your situation, since its long distance kinda, you should drop the texting down to a maximum of 3-5 texts a day between you two and they should be emotionally charged and with a purpose. With a purpose as in, to set up Skype dates, hangouts, to dhv with something that happened to you, or to leave her a cliffhanger wanting more. You lucked out with her, because obviously she's either a textaholic and loves the attention, or her interest level is sky high in you, because she should not be responding to you at all IMO.

    Don't ever dlv yourself again by saying you don't know anybody. I don't even understand the logic behind that. To build rapport? No, you've already done that...

    Why do you care if she thinks its odd you're changing your texting style? Yeah, she'll probably notice. Yeah, it'll probably intrigue her. Yeah, she'll probably find it more attractive. But you do whatever the hell you want, you're a man right? So stop caring what she thinks about you.

    Yes, you look desperate and she probably knows that you are sub-consciously. Girls pick up on that. When you're in Prague, you only text her about something cool that happened, or to talk to her on SKYPE for a few minutes because you have crazy fun plans later.

    Then you find girls in Prague and have fun with them.

    You're never lonely. You're awesome, awesome people are never lonely. Even if you are lonely, think that way.

    Yes, acting like you barely have a minute of spare time would be the way to go about talking to her.

    The ONE example of a good text to send in Prague I'll give you:

    OH MY GOD (her name). Prague is stunning! You would never believe what happened last night. Wanna know what'd make it even more perfect? If you were here....Doing my laundry and cooking me food. Hehe.
    (she replies whatever, wait a few mins)
    THen reply: I have awesome plans later that I can't miss, but i'd love to SKYPE you for a few mins and talk. 7:09pm, lets Skype. Just be careful, you may fall head over heals in love with me after this and I'm a heartbreaker

    Fun, flirty, challenging, interesting, DHV texts pushing for hangouts or SKYPE sessions. These are things you need to do towards her.

    I got bored in math class and decided to type this. Enjoy.

  3. #13
    LAMEtext is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    Please thank your math teacher for being so boring!

    I seem to have forgotten to say I only replied to her message after 5 months, and she even contacted her boss to get my name. So yeah, she made quite some efforts!

    When we started texting she indeed was a textaholic (which I am as well), but I knew from start it would NEVER work to maintain this "relation" for such a long period.

    the messages before the drunk texts were really solid, she replied very interactively.

    Tomorrow I'll find me some prague girls to keep me focussed. If she does not text me by Monday evening I will fire another shot. Using the tips & tricks you gave!

    Oh and I'm pretty sure she receives A LOT of texts from other guys, she already showed me a few. Trust me, she is stunning.

  4. #14
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    Please thank your math teacher for being so boring!
    See, there you go. That's a starting point for wit and humor. Now keep that trend in mind when you text her.

    Kyl brings up a good point about constantly feeding you examples. It goes back to the saying "Catch a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish he will eat for a lifetime."

    Two texting books you should read because most of your questions will be answered there.
    - b4utxther by Race De Priest
    - Magnetic Messaging by Bobby Rio and Rob Judge.
    - Also look up the forums on some free guides (by T-Mal)

    This girl's interest in you is already high. So you don't have to be desperate or even work too hard. But you can still screw yourself with bad texting and that is what you want to avoid. I would worry about what/how not to text her more. In terms of texting style, just be the "best of you." You might have to think harder creatively when you text, but over time it will get easier. Think of it as a challenge.

    You say she is a stunning Euro-chick and lots of guys are texting her...well ultimately, you will need to get better all around if you want to stand out from the competition. Also, girls like her don't usually text first because she is in demand, and after all the neediness in your text game, I highly doubt so. IF she does then it's a damn good sign of her interest in you still.

    But just don't rely on a good text game, you need to get your ass back into town and close the deal and meet her. It's a new game there and what matters the most. Hopefully your real game is better than your text.

  5. #15
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    thanks for your reply!

    I watched the preview and bought the Magnetic Messaging book. Hopefully by the end of tomorrow I'll be a lot better at it, ready to have my first attempt on monday.

    You're absolutely right about the fact that: even if I win her back by texting, she still has to be won IRL. My goal is set to meet her somewhere in March (preferably the first two weeks).

    I probably have many problems with my IRL game as well, so any advice on that is more than welcome. Haven't checked out all guides yet, on how to get rid of my shy'ness, but that is planned for this month!

    At the moment I have A LOT of eyecontact with the girls I'm interested in, and I'd say 50% of the time they come talking to me. My shyness is often ruining a lot of success, anyway... I'm going off-topic (I'll open a new thread somewhere next week).

  6. #16
    LAMEtext is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    One more thing...

    1) I already told her I will try to come to LA in March, having not heard anything back from her: can I assume this is still okay for her?
    2) If it's okay, do I need to mention it in any of our conversations?
    3) If it's not okay, do I need to mention it in any of our conversation?
    4) how to discover if it's okay/not okay for her?

    I told her I'd book the tickets after the Prague trip.

    My personal view on this: she's still okay with it, but if I start telling her "I'm really looking forward to LA" or mention it too much, I will (again) look very needy/boring.

    Instead I would go for following approach:

    1) use my time to get her emotionally attracted in the next 7-10 days (again)
    2) send her a message with the ONE date I have free in my calendar to come over to LA. (i can not ask anything like "if you're still up for it?" or "Do you have time then?")If she does not have any interest or time, she will tell me anyway.

    Correct me if needed!

  7. #17
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    Excellent, you are making an investment into getting better and that is great.

    1) I already told her I will try to come to LA in March, having not heard anything back from her: can I assume this is still okay for her?
    2) If it's okay, do I need to mention it in any of our conversations?
    3) If it's not okay, do I need to mention it in any of our conversation?
    4) how to discover if it's okay/not okay for her?
    My personal view on this: she's still okay with it, but if I start telling her "I'm really looking forward to LA" or mention it too much, I will (again) look very needy/boring.
    Tell her you are looking forward to doing a certain activity in LA...something she suggested in the past (without mentioning that you are really looking forward to seeing her).

    It's not about how often you mention it, it's how you say it that will make you look needy or not. The keyword is "PLAYFUL PERSISTENCE" This part I will admit is tough. It will take some wit and creative writing on your part. What I normally do is I sneak the idea of a date reminder in our text, stealthily and conceal it with humor.

    So with the girl I'm working on, I remembered trying to get her out for sushi. Last thanksgiving our text went like this. Using the same technique I mentioned.
    --------------
    ME: Happy thanksgiving, [X]! Normally I would tell u to eat up, get fat and feel bad about it afterwards. BUT I think u safe with your relative’s cooking. Deep fried turkey...mmmm. Lol,
    HER: Hahaha yeah it might‘ve been a good idea to eat beforehand! Happy Thanksgiving [X]!
    The next day I texted her:
    ME: Hey [X], I got the perfect cure for getting over the trauma of deep fried turkey...yummy sushi with hot guys named [my name]
    ---------------

    She didn't respond to that. But the next time I saw her in person and brought up sushi, she bust out in laughter. The hardest I ever saw her laugh. She was so caught up in the moment, she agreed. But our date didn't happen because we didn't have enough time to eat before class. And 1 month goes by with me being out of town...

    A few days ago, I tried to close for our long awaited date via text. This time for tea instead.

    ---------------------
    After 5 lines of banter (chewing her out for skipping meals)
    HER: I can’t dance and eat at the same time! Ha
    ME: Lol. U be the best salsa dancer in the world if u can do that. Your new count will be 1, 2, 3 take a bite, 5, 6, 7 take a bite.
    HER: Im afraid that id run too high a risk of having my lunch come back for an encore.
    HER: It’s not fun to spin on a full stomach
    ME: Ew. Y’ had to remind me. I get that feeling whenever I do my leg workouts. And guess what I’m working on tonite? Almost gym time. If u r down for something gut soothing like tea tomorrow or Saturday, let’s meet. Promise, no encore

    So I creatively and smoothly snuck it in there, asking her out. The next day, she texted me in the morning. This was her answer:

    HER: How’d leg day go? My Saturday is jammed. How about Monday?

    BAM!!! I got her to suggest a day to meet. And just to not to sound overexcited, my response to her 30 minutes later was:

    ME: Got thru it and feeling it this morning...which is good because I need my legs for salsa Saturday. I think I should be free Monday.

    By doing it this way, it should answer your other questions as well. If it is okay, she will show enthusiasm in some shape or form. She will tell you. If it is not okay, she will make excuses or give you iffy/vague answers.

  8. #18
    LAMEtext is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    Very nice writing (I LIKE practical examples!).

    The weirdest part about this advanced texting approach is:

    - I do no longer watch my phone every 5 minutes.
    - I feel my chances have increased A LOT because I actually have a plan now

    I can't wait to create an update post about how it went, hopefully good. *fingers crossed*

    Thanks for the information!!

  9. #19
    LAMEtext is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    Sooo, I finally send her a text message this morning (10hours ago):

    The conversation:

    ME: "Damnnn, Prague is truely BEAUTIFULL !!! The only thing missing is a tunnel from LA till here... at least then we would be able to steal some cats! ;-)"
    SHE: Heeey
    SHE: hahah
    SHE: Ooh I miss my cats !!

    Text analysis:

    The only thing missing is a tunnel from LA till here ...

    She already said this once herself, that she wished there was a tunnel between LA and where I live. So I found it a good way to remind her about a good conversation/talk we had ?

    ... at least then we would be able to steal some cats! ;-)

    A week ago I read a story on facebook about a student who woke up with a random cat in his bed. He was so drunk he could not remember how the cat got there. She laughed with the story and told me how she has cats herself (in Europe) and that she misses them very much and that she'd do everything if they got lost. I replied that I would steal her cats so that she'd be back in Europe. She told me it would be a dilemma.

    My point with "stealing cats" is referring to having a drink with her, but I'm not entirely sure she got it. (did I go too far?)

    I added a "wink" smiley to make it clear it was a joke and to keep it a bit "light". Should I really stop using smileys entirely ? (she really likes them...)


    My view on her reply:

    Positive:

    1. She did not reply with one word or a smiley
    2. She greeted me with "heeey"
    3. She texted me immediately when she woke up (in fact, this is the earliest she ever texted me)


    Negative:

    1. She did not ask how my trip was
    2. She did not ask a question


    The end:

    I'd really appreciate some feedback!
    Also, even though she replied only after 10hours... she was probably just sleeping. I will reply in 6-7 hours (when I'm back from going out in Prague). If I follow the rule I should reply quicker right?

    She already told me that was really pissed that I only replied after 5months on her facebook message. So letting her wait is a good thing, I guess? ;-)

  10. #20
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    Default Re: drunk texting issue

    Newsflash:

    So I texted her before I had dinner, this is how it went:

    ME: "This evening we're going for dinner and afterwards to Roxy club!"
    ME: "You are missing your cats, I miss your sense for humor, let's catch up this evening?"
    ME: "At 15h07 (LA timezone) on Skype
    ME: "I warn you already, it's very cold here, so don't dare to wear sunglasses! "

    < one hour later>

    SHE: "Really? There is a Roxy there?"
    SHE: "Aww, I'll try but I'm having luch in st monica and it's super far so I will not be back in time!!"
    SHE: "I have sooooo much to do lately "

    < ten minutes later>

    ME: "That's perfect, then it won't be a boring conversation! What do you think about 15h11?"

    < nine minutes later>

    SHE: "hahaha 4min later? "
    SHE: "what's with the minutes?"
    SHE: "I can try but I have no clue when I'll be home!"

    < 30 minutes later>

    ME: "Ideal! See you soon, don't be a minute too late! "

    < 15 minutes later>

    SHE: "whats with the minutes?"
    SHE: "I'll try, but it's really possible I'll still be at the beach!"

    < 1hour 30 minutes later>

    ME: "It doesn't always have to be boring! ;-)"

    < instant text back>

    SHE: "?"
    SHE: "I don't follow..."
    SHE: "What you mean with boring?"

    < instant text back>

    ME: "haha, those minutes"

    < instant text back>

    SHE: "I don't understand what is boring about it?"
    SHE: "and why 15.07?"
    SHE: "Or do I miss something!"

    < instant text back>

    ME: "haha no no, 15h00 looked so casual, not?"

    this was 1 hour before 15h07! she never replied back

    At the same moment, I notice on she posted on her Facebook that she had a flat tire.

    Now I did not message her anything and I'm now going off too bed.
    I felt like I made a good start, but I have overreacted with the minutes (she kept interrogating about it, and she took me off guard).

    How could I have done this any better?

    If I don't have any message when I wake up, this is a bad thing, right? Which actions do you guys advise?

    Thanks!


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