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  • 1 Post By ThtNikkaGP
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Thread: Confused! How to reply to "I'm not free til 3 weeks?"

  1. #1
    Pua_uk is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Confused! How to reply to "I'm not free til 3 weeks?"

    Hey, wondered if I could get some advice?

    Absolutely adore this girl (an 8), I'm trying to not come off as needy but effectively she's making me wait. I have got a big heart and for the first time in ages, she's a girl I really like. She is lovely, different and claims she's not a 'game-player.'

    We had a great first date of which culminated well. She seemed quite surprised a guy liked her slightly eccentric personality. She wanted to know the answer to this question about me all day, I said 'if you kiss me on the cheek I'll tell you'. She responded with 'how about a kiss on the lips, what will that get me?' and she gave me a full-on frenchie. I did give her the answer. We said we would see each other soon

    I didn't hear from her since, I thought I would leave it up to her as I instigated the date the first time, and I thought she'd be keen enough on me to make the next move. I gave up after a week and texted it would be nice to see her again, she says the same back. Each reply from her takes hours and hours which is frustrating. I take my time too reply too so I don't appear over-eager.

    She says she's been very busy with studying (legit excuse) and sorry for the late reply. She gives me a random date mid-march when maybe she would be free.

    I'm not sure how to respond to this?

  2. #2
    ThtNikkaGP is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Confused! How to reply to "I'm not free til 3 weeks?"

    tell her you don't know wat ur schedule looks like tht far ahead, even if you do, and tell her you'll text her when you find out.

    when you see her in person build more attraction that's probably why she takes longer to responsed and why she won't set a sooner date.

    honestly thou id move on and game other girls. If she really liked you shed find time nd not set a date 3 weeks from now. Which she'll most likely flake on btw

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    DirectIsBest is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Confused! How to reply to "I'm not free til 3 weeks?"

    It sounds like you waited when you shouldn't have. Some women won't contact you even if you had a great first date and they are interested. I would have called her three days later and set up another date.

    I think allot of guys read on here that you shouldn't ALWAYS initiate, and honestly, I don't think that's true. I've actually hurt myself a few times by waiting for her to initiate.

    There's two women I've dated in particular that I'll give as examples. Woman A: I dated for over a year. I hung out with her once or twice a week for three months before she became my official girlfriend. I know for a FACT that she didn't initiate ONCE for at least the first month and a half. Hell, she might not have initiated until she was my official girlfriend. If she did it wasn't often. I was sleeping with this girl too!

    Woman B: I dated briefly but she was head over heels for me. She only initiated TWICE when it wasn't confirming plans or talking about a date I had already set up.

    The point is this: If I hadn't initiated, and waited, I wouldn't have dated either one of these women. Both these women were the BEST looking girls I have ever slept with! Take the lead and don't expect a girl to initiate. Just because she won't initiate DOES NOT mean she's not into you.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Confused! How to reply to "I'm not free til 3 weeks?"

    I've seen and been in your situation dozens of time.

    I agree that you should not have waited to re-initiate for a D2. This isn't a deal breaker but don't make this mistake ever again and assume a woman will initiate with you. You are a man. Take the lead.

    It is important to point out that dating and relationships is all about timing and where you are in your walk of life. If she is going to be busy with school, then that is her priority and it is taking up her headspace. It doesn't mean she likes you any less. Chances are she wants to be focused and will be stressed. And if her mind is not free, she wouldn't want to hook up with you and not be at her best. Put yourself in her shoes, if you are not at your best, stressed out, distracted, would you want to date? So unless, you are some high status individual like a movie star she got a crush on, only something that powerful can distract her from her studies, but that is not necessarily a good thing.

    A lot of guys posts similar situations as yours. And the answer is always the same. The good news is this girl gave you an ETA when it will be a good time. A lot of guys don't get this courtesy and have to put up with flakes.

    The only thing you can do is let the 3 weeks run its course and

    1. Hit her up with some holding pattern texts to stay on her radar. Don't over do it.
    2. Go out with other girls in the meantime to hone your game.
    3. After the 3 weeks re-initiate with this girl to close for D2

    One last thing: Never ever get frustrated over a rate a girl texts you. That's a sign of neediness for a response. Every girl texts differently. Some are textaholics. From my experience, the busy ones tend to text less frequently (sometimes a day late) and are more conservative with texting in general. At least you got a response. Be grateful for that.


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