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Thread: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

  1. #1
    twla is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Question Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    I think I already got off to a bad start because she preferred me to add her on Facebook rather than to give me her number. Her reason was that she wants to know a little more about me (or anyone) who approaches her through their facebook page to get a better understanding. Made sense to me at the time.

    Has this happened to anyone? I'm thinking to message her and use some info from her photos to find common ground. Would this come off as creepy or a stalker-esque approach?

    Must appreciated!

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    college? or public day game?

    FB or other social media contacts is just about as hard as typical texting if you dont see this person regularly. in some aspects social media actually complicates things more because anything can happen. if you got to some Kino or really strong emotional connection i think FB and other social media outlets would be fine to progress but there's no guarantee just like with a phone number. a phone number in my opinion is more private and personable. but it really depends.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    She's currently in college and works at a local bar/lounge, which is where we met. I've only been a few times but just so happened I went twice this week and she remembers me. The times I flagged her down for simple requests, she took the time to carry a conversation with me. I was a bit surprised because it was pretty busy at the time. I saw it as an ioi and proceeded to ask for her number before leaving.

    Definitely on the fence about whether or not to pull facebook info because to me personally it seems a bit intrusive. At the same time she advised that we get to know each other better through facebook first.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    i'd say add her. it won't hurt. i wouldn't try to communicate too heavily on FB unless you both have the same schedules and have your messenger thingy active.

    in my opinion as to how to move forward from here... be a regular at her place of work this way you guys can build rapport and might even be able to establish inside jokes or games. with that said----DON'T GIVE HER ALL OF YOUR ATTENTION. i think it's important to build rapport in person more than through technology. when you're there in person you can read someone's verbal and physical signals on top of more interaction. i'd highly suggest finding some commonality like say sports, bands, or some kind of social event and invite her to it so it seems simple and non-date like where you have a few friends over and she can bring some friends over. unless you know you can for sure 100% get her attention to lock down into a date.

    the reason why i don't think you should approach her like any other girl in a daygame scenario is because you only know her at her place of work. if she's not 100% infatuated with you then she's got no reason to go on date, lunch or coffee considering she probably gets hit on all day long while she works. be friendly and build rapport but don't forget to break rapport by flirting. you don't want to be friendzoned right?

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    I definitely feel the same about building rapport in person and being able to make better decisions based on verbal and physical signals. I added her and am just waiting for her to accept. With your advice I'm thinking just casual conversations via facebook but build up something more personal in person. Thanks artandale!

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    treat any FB conversation just like texts unless you do a skype or google hangout---where you both can see each other. that opens up the possibilities of an open range of emotions which for her is healthy. one way you can convince her if she is messaging you enough where you feel you can build traction tell her you don't really like typing on your computer and that if you're gonna be distracted you'd rather give your full attention to it--so facetime, skype or google hangout so you can get eye contact and not surf the web and whatever... you should get the idea.

    getting eye contact can be a huge dhv if you can explain yourself properly the first time. don't push it BUT do sound convincing and eye opening.

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    Default Re: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    I would agree that Facetime or Skype can be a GREAT alternative to texting.

    I used Skype a couple months ago, right after I met my girlfriend. We chatted / texted / exchanged more pics, etc. for a couple days & she mentioned Skype. I thought to myself "That's a GREAT idea! Why didn't I think of that?" LOL!

    So, we had a little "online date" that ended up being SOOOO much fun!

    I decided the next night to try something bolder & original... I told her it would be cool to leave Skype on ALL NIGHT while we slept, so we could "spend the night together"...So we did. (Talk about building a HUGE connection!!)


    That also became "our thing". Every night since then when we're not "together", we spend the night with each other on Skype.

    I'm not sure how many girls would g for that idea... I've only tried it with one... and it worked.
    But if you're looking for an idea that most guys probably haven't suggested to her before, feel free to give it a shot.

    You can't be timid or unsure if you brig it up. You have to have absolute confidence! (And project a fun vibe when you do. )

    Also- never rush into rapport. And never "wait for the right time" to start making emotional connections.
    Just do it.

    "Casual conversations" in the beginning will also put you at a higher risk of being Friend Zoned... Save those for a later time. (Like AFTER you've had a few days of solid flirting & you know the attraction is there!)


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    Actually, the more i think about it--its really brilliant to do these online face to face dates because you can give the girl the option of just browsing the web while you guys talk, she can exit the date at any time.... And on google hangout you can do funny coolthings like put hats on, take pictures, play sound fx and so on. It helps break that Tension. One more reason why its great is that if your internet connection cuts out its like the world froze you out on the call... Which means you can test how interested she is by letting her text or fb message you back first. You can play it off as your internet router just disconnnected your wifi.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    First off I would like to thank both of you for your input and feed back! They're much appreciated!

    Getting a Skype date or Google Hangout is the goal, but I'm having trouble with taking the steps to get there. I feel I'm treading very carefully at the moment because the initial Number Close didn't go as planned. With that in the back of my head, I feel starting off casually would be a better way to go but I'm having trouble building the steps leading to a face-to-face online session. At the same time how does one wrestle with the fine line between casual conversation and flirting in the beginning, it seems like a conflicting interest with not wanting to get friend-zoned no?

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Pulling Facebook Info to Start Convo

    When you are 't putting your sexuality out there you arent being honest and you're compensating too much for her comfort. Think about what you want. If the conversation value isnt interesting enough for you shift it. But, dont be rude.

    As for how to move it to a skype or google hangout thingy--dont ask her to do it unless you and her have gone back and fourth with texts or FB messages for 5 minutes straight with non stop replies. Like if you sense you both are feeling like you guys are actively talking to each other and she's online thats the best time. Dont say hey hit me up for a skype date. It'll probably be too soon. I would suggest if the first skype date went well it wouldnt hurt to do skype calls before you goto bed. Just be like "you're fun... Skype me later tonight before you goto bed, i'd really like to talk to you one more time"


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