Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 10 of 10
Like Tree2Likes
  • 1 Post By T-Mal
  • 1 Post By artandale

Thread: Tinder date gone awry

  1. #1
    Richghostt is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 118, Level: 2
    Level completed: 36%, Points required for next Level: 32
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    100 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Ottawa
    Posts
    39
    Points
    118
    Level
    2
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Tinder date gone awry

    So I met this girl on Tinder, we went out for a few beers (first date), then had sex at my place a few times before I drove her home (should probably write a lay report about this). Thing is that was last Tuesday and she Texted me avidly until Friday at noon and I haven't heard from her since. I waited over the weekend as I had other things happening and Texted her this morning but have yet to hear back. So the question is a 2-parter: Is this Anti Slut Defence from her and how do I bust through it?

    Thanks,
    Ghostt

  2. #2
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 31,222, Level: 100
    Level completed: 0%, Points required for next Level: 0
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social25000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Awards:
    Posting Award
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    Southern Michigan USA
    Posts
    2,558
    Points
    31,222
    Level
    100
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 9 Times in 8 Posts
    Rep Power
    1391

    Default Re: Tinder date gone awry

    After you sleep with a girl, you CAN'T wait a couple days to get ahold of her again if you want to keep seeing her.

    Doing that makes her feel like that's all you were after.

    I don't care how busy you are, you have to at least send a couple little texts to check in & be flirty... just to prevent her from thinking you used her for a one-nighter.

    check my "Magic Texts" thread for plenty of ideas / examples of things you can send, just to keep in contact.

    It only takes a couple seconds to shoot a quick message to her & keep the positive vibe happening.


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  3. #3
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 31,222, Level: 100
    Level completed: 0%, Points required for next Level: 0
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social25000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Awards:
    Posting Award
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    Southern Michigan USA
    Posts
    2,558
    Points
    31,222
    Level
    100
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 9 Times in 8 Posts
    Rep Power
    1391

    Default Re: Tinder date gone awry

    I had a brain pause & missed the part about it happening on Tuesday...

    I still would have dropped her a line over the weekend though. But give her some time to reply if you just texted her this morning.

    Also- still check out the magic texts thread, because those are designed to get a reply & keep the interaction going.



    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  4. #4
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 4,719, Level: 43
    Level completed: 85%, Points required for next Level: 31
    Overall activity: 53.0%
    Achievements:
    Social1000 Experience Points7 days registered
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Location
    Los Angeles, CA
    Posts
    820
    Points
    4,719
    Level
    43
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts
    Rep Power
    238

    Default Re: Tinder date gone awry

    Yea never ignore a woman if youre interested. People Freeze Out thinking it works but most of the time they freeze out at the wrong stages during attraction. Take t-mal's advice for the future.

    As for what ro do next... You gotta earn her trust back in my opinion. So basically you're starting from scratch again if she hasnt responded. So dont get all needy and text her 10 times in one day when she hasnt responded...
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  5. #5
    Richghostt is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 118, Level: 2
    Level completed: 36%, Points required for next Level: 32
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    100 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Ottawa
    Posts
    39
    Points
    118
    Level
    2
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Re: Tinder date gone awry

    Artandale, Any suggestions on how to "re-start" not included in T-Mal's list?

  6. #6
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 4,719, Level: 43
    Level completed: 85%, Points required for next Level: 31
    Overall activity: 53.0%
    Achievements:
    Social1000 Experience Points7 days registered
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Location
    Los Angeles, CA
    Posts
    820
    Points
    4,719
    Level
    43
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts
    Rep Power
    238

    Default Re: Tinder date gone awry

    i think having her text in front of us might help set the tone if she was upset or not. your original post on the thread is a bit too general it out of.

    a general direction though would be to acknowledge the emotional state she was in from not hearing from you for days. something like "hey, i'm sorry for last week--been really swamped with work and family stuff. didn't mean to ignore you..." and then continue from there to see about meeting up as a way to temperature check her mood with you. if she wants to see you--you're still in and don't have to do that much repair. if she's hesitant or saying no then you gotta get her to set up a qualification scenario that you build upwards towards making it sound like it was her idea.

    IF all of the above isn't the case--which it isn't because you've texted her at least twice... (also we don't know what you sent her so we can't really build upon what you said unless you share that). i'm going to just assume you made an apology and that you asked if she was mad on top of trying to get her to hang out one more time. IF this is the case, my suggestion is to keep your texts light as if they're just subtle reminders that you're thinking about her. keep them dynamic enough to where she can respond to them as if you didn't complete a full story or thought with her. i'd suggest you do a little more thread reading and look at T-Mal's Text Bible thread as there are a lot of those examples from the community. with all this said i think it's important for you to act like shes read everything you've sent her but more importantly that her ignoring you doesn't bother you. i'd say if she continues to ignore you see about calling her towards the evening when you know more than likely she isn't working--and probably at home. frame your personality as if everything's cool and that you just wanted to hear her voice. keep it simple but filled with strong emotional spikes where she has to challenge her own thoughts and answers before she gives them out.

    why do this? because it makes it clear that you're not just in it for sex--although you made it seem like it was on your first date. you're pretty much going in reverse in starting a relationship with her. you went from sex to now getting to know her. in someways you can make this work for yourself but you really need to believe it--and what i'm talking about is the idea that you enjoy messy beginnings because if you can get lost in them you can feel more attached to them later on. you might have to do your own re-wording and rearrangement of the beliefs there. there's more depth to it than that but that's the jist of it. it's the reversed formula to how most people meet people and then build up comfort and sexual Tension. why tell her this IF she questions you? ...because you're looking for something memorable. you're looking to make mistakes as much as fixing them because that's the kind of relationship you're looking for. you're looking for something that isn't just something you can just toss out and forget about. you're looking for something you can learn from, be apart of and grow with... well... this would be my answer anyways--i can't imagine everyone saying this because most people don't believe in making mistakes. i do.

    in the end you can't forget that you still need to work on yourself and improve your own human behavior and interaction with women. the more you tend to act as if they were just some play thing the more they'll pick up on it and you'll lose out on actually finding a good woman whose around for a week, a month, a year.. a decade.. a lifetime...
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  7. #7
    Richghostt is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 118, Level: 2
    Level completed: 36%, Points required for next Level: 32
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    100 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Ottawa
    Posts
    39
    Points
    118
    Level
    2
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Re: Tinder date gone awry

    So our conversation before she went cold was like this, bear in mind that the habs had just lost to the rangers the night before and she's a Rangers fan:

    Friday May 30
    (8:32) HER: Hehe so happy!!
    (8:34) ME: Curse you and your allegiances!! :P
    (8:35) ME: Did you just get to the office? (Works at the CFIA)
    (8:36) HER: Yeaa I start at 8:30
    (8:37) ME: I'd enjoy those extra 30 minutes of sleep :P
    (8:37) HER: Lool truee !
    (8:43) ME: Whatcha got planned for this weekend?
    (9:14) HER: Going out to the market with some friends tonight
    (9:15) ME: Getting Yassie (her name) drunk again?
    (9:36) HER: Hehe yupp !
    (10:00) ME: Good On Ya

    Monday June 2
    (9:02) ME: Hows the CFIA treating you this AM?

    Radio silence since then...
    Thoughts? Comments? AFC?

  8. #8
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 4,719, Level: 43
    Level completed: 85%, Points required for next Level: 31
    Overall activity: 53.0%
    Achievements:
    Social1000 Experience Points7 days registered
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Location
    Los Angeles, CA
    Posts
    820
    Points
    4,719
    Level
    43
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts
    Rep Power
    238

    Default Re: Tinder date gone awry

    for some reason i thought you said that you guys did sexy time earlier in the week last week and you ignored hill till friday. confusing...

    anyways give her a call during lunch tomorrow or something. just be like--"hey, just wanted to hear your voice while i was on my lunch break." even if it's a voicemail... this will get her a chance to respond--women like the unexpected--and when everyone is texting these days you'll stand out a bit more just for calling. plus you'll have her attention instead of sitting around waiting for her. let her call you back unless you can't wait--then call just before dinner. if shes free just invite her over... anyways, keep it simple.
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  9. #9
    Richghostt is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 118, Level: 2
    Level completed: 36%, Points required for next Level: 32
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    100 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Ottawa
    Posts
    39
    Points
    118
    Level
    2
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Re: Tinder date gone awry

    We had sex a few times Tuesday after the Habs game, then texted Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. I like you idea, thanks!

  10. #10
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 4,719, Level: 43
    Level completed: 85%, Points required for next Level: 31
    Overall activity: 53.0%
    Achievements:
    Social1000 Experience Points7 days registered
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Location
    Los Angeles, CA
    Posts
    820
    Points
    4,719
    Level
    43
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts
    Rep Power
    238

    Default Re: Tinder date gone awry

    also i don't think it sounds like she'd think of herself as a slut yet. from the story it doesn't sound like you've ignored her at all. everyone needs a few days. give her some time today--tomorrow try that phone call.
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.


Similar Threads

  1. Can You Figure Out This Weird Tinder Date?
    By CaConfused in forum General Questions
    Replies: 4
    Last Thread: 05-25-2014, 01:15 PM
  2. Slow texting, third date set up (tinder chick)
    By iltf604 in forum General Questions
    Replies: 7
    Last Thread: 04-14-2014, 04:26 PM
  3. Might have a date tomorrow with a HB9 from Tinder so....
    By NoctisCaelumPUA in forum General Questions
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 11-15-2013, 08:56 AM
  4. Tinder - How not to mess it up
    By RicoSuaveInTraining in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 9
    Last Thread: 11-13-2013, 06:49 AM
  5. Anyone used the app Tinder?
    By gja914 in forum General Questions
    Replies: 0
    Last Thread: 08-05-2013, 11:05 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com