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  1. #1
    havefun is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Girl is playing Hard to get?

    Hi gyus!

    I am gaming a girl, which is playing hard to get and would want to know if I am doing it right.
    So she:
    - initiates conversation and will keep it if I stop
    - is talking about other boys giving her compliments and stuff
    - is saying that we havent seen each other from a long time
    - is really reactive, for example if we have a small chat at nights and when I say "sweet dreams" she will go crazy, because I have to leave. She even removed me from facebook (and added me again later), just to show how mad is she
    - she is flirting like by calling me names like "babe".
    - is constantly asking about other girls. I have a motorbike and she was like "Are you riding with other girls" and so on...

    At some point she will pull back and start blowing me off with shit tests, showing desinterst in the topic or tries to "make fun" of a decision or hobby of mine.
    So what I am doing:
    - not falling for shit tests
    - just re-framing by changing the topic with something positive and fun

    Can you give me an idea how to break through this "hard to get" role she is playing.
    Even: Am I doing my job right and are this really indicators she is into me.

  2. #2
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Girl is playing Hard to get?

    She's young & immature. OR.... She has emotional issues.
    (Or both).

    My ex was constantly hot & cold like that. She would be amazing one minute; then in a blink, she would become distant & closed-off.

    The constant wishy-washy attitude was too much to take. (Which is why she's now my EX.)

    Honestly, I would be cautious here.
    Girls like that oftentimes become more unstable as time goes on.


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  3. #3
    havefun is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Girl is playing Hard to get?

    Quote Originally Posted by T-Mal View Post
    She's young & immature. OR.... She has emotional issues.
    Bullseye, both correct!

    But that only because she has not been with a guy like me.

    I can easily see how much she cares and is interested, but then when she gets in the bad-mood she is like walking hell.

    Any advice on how to deal with this is appreciated.

  4. #4
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    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Girl is playing Hard to get?

    Being that she's young, you might be able to use psychology.

    Just like teaching little kids how to be respectful & have manners, you need to reward positive behavior, & ignore her when she's acting wacky.

    Don't show her extra attention she acts like an immature child. Otherwise she'll assume that's the way you want her to be.


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  5. #5
    havefun is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Girl is playing Hard to get?

    Two or three days ago she texted me on chat a few times. There was some delay between the messages, as she was trying to make me look at my phone.

    Eventually when I got home I responded. She was really jealous and emotional (angry).

    She said that she lost her time with me and how apparently I dont respect her at all since I don't even bother to answer her. She told me to go to the other (refering to other girls she saw me in a cafeteria and some of my Facebook statuses with flirty comments from girls).

    Her last words were "Do not bother contacting me anymore". I am pretty sure that she wants me to chase her. I will not contact her, but I am wondering how much time will it take for her to brake and re-initiate contact again?

  6. #6
    ConnorMaxwell72 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Girl is playing Hard to get?

    She sounds really immature lol, but I'd call her bluff on it. Girls like her, especially those "tester" types (i.e. girls that thrive off attention from a bunch of guys, keeps orbiters, constantly throwing sh!t tests), thrive off of some reaction from you. They're always testing you to try and break you, so they can prove to themselves that you're not worth being with her. The key is to be in control and seemingly indifferent to her acting out. If she tells you "go hang out with those other girls!" say "ok, fine." (And I always actually did - teach them a lesson, because they clearly DON'T want you to hang out with them, but they can only blame themselves for when you do lol).

    If you chase her, you're just falling for her trap. What I would do is wait close to a week, and send her a message that's totally noncommittal like "hey, I just saw xyz, thought you'd find that interesting. lol". She'll probably jump all over it. Just remember to stay in control. When girls like her throw fits, you gotta almost "put them in time out" and not play this emotional game they throw around. The AFC would fall for this and be apologetic, groveling, and trying to win back her approval.

    She needs your approval, and that's how you'll stand out from the rest of her orbiters.

  7. #7
    havefun is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Girl is playing Hard to get?

    Quote Originally Posted by ConnorMaxwell72 View Post
    She sounds really immature lol, but I'd call her bluff on it. Girls like her, especially those "tester" types (i.e. girls that thrive off attention from a bunch of guys, keeps orbiters, constantly throwing sh!t tests), thrive off of some reaction from you. They're always testing you to try and break you, so they can prove to themselves that you're not worth being with her. The key is to be in control and seemingly indifferent to her acting out. If she tells you "go hang out with those other girls!" say "ok, fine." (And I always actually did - teach them a lesson, because they clearly DON'T want you to hang out with them, but they can only blame themselves for when you do lol).

    If you chase her, you're just falling for her trap. What I would do is wait close to a week, and send her a message that's totally noncommittal like "hey, I just saw xyz, thought you'd find that interesting. lol". She'll probably jump all over it. Just remember to stay in control. When girls like her throw fits, you gotta almost "put them in time out" and not play this emotional game they throw around. The AFC would fall for this and be apologetic, groveling, and trying to win back her approval.

    She needs your approval, and that's how you'll stand out from the rest of her orbiters.
    That was exactly what I was thinking

    I would even wait for more than a week. Actually I am pretty sure she will contact me before 10 days have passed.

  8. #8
    Newone is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Girl is playing Hard to get?

    Oh man, just like my ex. She was my oneitis but I'm pretty sure what you are going through. Don't fall, just, don't fall. Date other girl, and try to compare your experience on both of them. She will drag you down so hard to her level. You will get frustrated, jealous, etc. You are on your way to a emotional coaster. Forget about her, there are more quality woman. This is an opinion base on experience.

  9. #9
    havefun is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Girl is playing Hard to get?

    Quote Originally Posted by Newone View Post
    Oh man, just like my ex. She was my oneitis but I'm pretty sure what you are going through. Don't fall, just, don't fall. Date other girl, and try to compare your experience on both of them. She will drag you down so hard to her level. You will get frustrated, jealous, etc. You are on your way to a emotional coaster. Forget about her, there are more quality woman. This is an opinion base on experience.
    I am dating other girls and I am constantly out with other people, so I am not afraid of onetis and jealousy sh*t.

    As ConnorMaxwell72 already said she is the kind of girl that has a lot of attention from guys. The type of chick that has 100+ likes on a facebook photo and a lot of instagram followers. However I do know the people from her social circle and they dont even barely have my value.

    I know her well and she really has some qualities that I love seeing in a girl. I do know that there are other girls and I do not "game" only her.

    I take the situation (not the girl) like a challenge. I just want to handle this like a real man and not just give up and pass to the next girl, because she told be some random sh*t.


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