So I've continued to mess around with pof. I spend very little time on it but thanks to a few tweaks with my profile (thanks T-Mal) I've got my response rate up to about 60%. That's right, 60% of the women I'm messaging, message me back.
If they are lame to talk too I just don't respond. I've had quite a few REALLY attractive women who I've stopped talking too because they weren't investing in the conversation enough or I thought they were boring. I just number closed an HB 9 without even asking for her number.
The way I went about this is TOTALLY different from T-Mal's technique so I thought I would share it with you. I must add a disclaimer: This will not work with allot of women on POF. You must be good at cold reading a girls photos and her writing. This is why my response rate has been so good. I'm amazing at reading a woman's personality through photos and in person. Work on this skill because it helps allot in real world pickup as well.
Me: I could tell from your photos that you were an artist. There's a sparkle in your eyes that give it away.
There's a few things in your profile that you could change that would help you attract the guys you're looking for. Get rid of the question mark in your headline. You ARE loud and proud and not afraid to say so. Also, get rid of the question marks in your statement "Make me smile and laugh??". You come across as hoping a guy will make you smile and laugh on the first date when you should KNOW he will.
These minor changes make a huge impact. You're an awesome, desirable woman. Let it be known without any excuses.
Her: Oh my goodness... That was pretty awesome of you to say.
Me: I know when I see someone that's different. That's something I look for, a unique individual.
You're a beautiful woman, but I feel like beauty is common these days. I want you to tell me 3 things about yourself that will make me want to know you more, and none of them can be about your looks. (Classic Neil Strauss qualifier)
Her: 1. I am understand and patient when it comes to problem solving in relationships or daily life tasks.
2. Courageous. I stand up for myself, no matter if you're my old or not. Speaking the truth, not out of pride or harm..
3. Respectful I just got out of a marriage that made me (in all honesty) crazy. I let myself go physically and mentally and I learning again about how love and respect myself.
Me: Those are three very good traits! I like how you were honest and straightforward about yourself. Not many people are. You made yourself vulnerable with some of those statements and I find that very attractive. You stand out from all the women on this website.
I want you to ask me something that you want to know about me. There's no limits or boundaries on what you can ask. Let your mind flow freely.
Her: Why thank you.
And I meant to say blood and not old on #2.
I want to know what you're struggling with at the moment in your life and what you do to try and make a difference in that situation.
Me: Whoa! That is a very thoughtful AND a good question!
In all honesty I'm really happy where I'm at in my life. I feel like I don't have the struggles that you're going threw right now.
My grandma is going to die soon. She has lost her mind and she doesn't know who I am. When she started to really lose her mind I cooked her salmon that I caught and brought it to her house and had dinner with her. She couldn't really speak English anymore (she's German) but she still knew who I was and loved it! I'm also acknowledging that she is going to die and there is nothing I can do about it. I've already accepted it. That's how I'm making a difference.
Whenever I struggle with ANYTHING I always remember that I have a long life and whatever I'm stressing about is only short term. In the big scheme of things it's not that important. That's how I deal with bad situations.
I always ask myself...In 5 years am I still going to think about it? Maybe a little, but not as much as I am now.
I feel like you have a sassy personality that you haven't shown me yet. Your facial expressions and body language TOTALLY give it away! I want to see that side of Bethany! :-P
I'm Direct by the way. :-)
Her: Let's talk more tomorrow Direct, I would like that.
Boom! Just got a number from a really attractive girl without asking in a few messages. Yea sh!t got deep fast but the conversation made an emotional connection and that's how I got the job done.
I must give some credit to T-Mal here. I did use a line or two of his in this convo, but 99% of it is mine. Cheers!