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  1. #1
    Khal Drogo is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Long distance relationship problems!!

    So, my girlfriend and I have been dating for more than a year now. Very recently, I moved to The UK, while she is in India. Since I have shifted, our insecurities have really compounded, and caused friction in the relationship.

    I feel like she is poison dripping me, but I can't do anything about it now, because the foundations we set for our relationship at the very outset, were extremely restrictive and controlling. Whenever I go back however, things are great and we are extremely happy. Despite the extreme distance, I still manage to travel back every month to meet her. She appreciates it at the time, but the moment I come back, BOOM, the entire routine of domination and controlling each other begins again. I really love this girl, but don't see how things can continue like this.

    Changing the entire frame of the relationship, at this stage, seems almost impossible. As a result of this, we have been growing apart slightly and fighting a lot. The future goal is still the same though. We want to be together and make this work. It is just that the path is seeming so difficult at the moment.

    Recently, she has gotten a job and has been busy working, which means that we have been getting even less time together. I have conditioned my emotional state, into a self destructive pattern, where in I am so attached to her presence in my day, that without her, I start feeling low. Then when we do eventually get to chat, The Vibe oscillates rapidly, and is rarely consistent.

    Lately, she has begun to blame me for not taking enough interest in her life. Now, I know I try my best, but the thing is I don't have the slightest inkling about her profession, and wouldn't have anything productive to offer any ways. I do care for her, and give her a great deal of affection, but perhaps my neediness and chodiness, is turning her off, and she seems to be blaming me for a lot of things. Stuff which was cool earlier, no longer is. The two of us keep sending each other pics, to prove that we are not cheating on each other. Trust issues are huge, and she continues to say 'you don't care'.

    What would be the best response to this complaint of hers, and how should I move this relationship forward, if I wish to be with her?

  2. #2
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Long distance relationship problems!!

    I think im gonna avoid giving you the advice you want because i dont know if you can visibly see the red flags in your relationship. I wont go too far but i think you need to strongly re-evaluate your situation and why you're looking to mend your rocky relationship.
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

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