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  • 1 Post By drgnsfire12
  • 1 Post By kylemc

Thread: Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

  1. #1
    1Hundred is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

    Whats up! New member here and I can already tell that this will be a forum I will be checking daily.

    So!

    I was messaging this girl on POF one night and we both kicked it off. I was planning on asking for her email the next night but all of sudden she deletes her account. Fotunately I was able to find her profile on Facebook as I remember her name and searched for her hometown (Winnipeg..)

    My question is how do I message her on facebook and get a date?!?!

  2. #2
    Swagman's Avatar
    Swagman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

    If she deleted her account without giving you some form of alternate contact information, then she probably isn't interested in you. Hunting her down on Facebook and asking her out will be detrimental to you, as she will view you as a creep.

    Your best bet is to move on. With that said, though, I would like to know how your conversation went. If there are any errors that you had made, then we can definitely help you to improve for the next conversation you have.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  3. #3
    1Hundred is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

    Appreciate it a lot. Deep down I knew this was the answer. As far as how the conversation went... I messaged her first by complimenting on her features (lips, eyes, hair, etc..) and told her I liked her cheekbones the most. I also said she looked like someone I would like to get to know. I asked her why she moved to Toronto.

    She replied back and thanked me for the compliments and said she came to Toronto because there were more opportunities here for her. She ended the message with "How's it going?"

    Oh.. and I also asked how does a girl with a background of Austrian, Polish, Trini and Latina know how to speak German. German was her second language on her profile. She told me she learned it to communicate with her family in Germany.

    This whole conversation was from two messages. After her message she deleted the account like the day after.


  4. #4
    drgnsfire12 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

    So basically your conversations were not fun and flirty, they were of the twenty question interview variety !?!?!

  5. #5
    kylemc is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

    Quote Originally Posted by drgnsfire12 View Post
    So basically your conversations were not fun and flirty, they were of the twenty question interview variety !?!?!
    LOL

    To OP not trying to bash but kicking it off with boring questions usually end up being boring conversations

  6. #6
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    Swagman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

    It's possible that he wasn't on a question spree. He didn't say that he asked a bunch of questions, only that there were a total of two messages in the conversation, and that he had asked two definitive questions. They were good questions, especially the language one, that would have started up a great conversation.

    Either one of three things could have happened here: Your comments on her physical appearance were typical and failed to build rapport, you were taking too long to respond to her messages and thus rapport was not built, or timing for you was unfortunate and she deleted her account just as things were getting started. Either way, the likely scenarios all revolve around the content of the messages and the rapport. Try to avoid comments on her physical appearances, and comment on things she points out in her profile instead. Also, don't respond too quickly, but don't take too long to message back either. You want to make sure the conversation is flowing at a rate where rapport is naturally building.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  7. #7
    drgnsfire12 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

    Swagman why does everybody talk about rapport and not attraction .... I mean the process is

    Introduction
    Attraction
    Rapport
    Seduction

    I always thought that nothing happens without attraction !?!?!?!?

  8. #8
    Swagman's Avatar
    Swagman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

    Because they've already done the introduction. Some PUAs, like Vin Dicarlo, merge Attraction and rapport because they both occur concurrently. Attraction to each other increases as Rapport improves. Seduction is a final step, necessary to create relationships, kiss closes, f-closes, etc.

    I personally believe in and use Vin DiCarlo's interpretation because it makes sense. You don't build up Attraction without having a conversation that also builds up Rapport.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  9. #9
    drgnsfire12 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should I message this girl from POF on facebook?

    That's pretty interesting Swag, I never thought about it that way, but I guess the rules of attraction aren't written in stone and you can learn something new everyday ...... Thanks


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