Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 9 of 9
Like Tree2Likes
  • 1 Post By drgnsfire12
  • 1 Post By Kvn07

Thread: SOI from her then freezes me out

  1. #1
    SirisBFF is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 61, Level: 1
    Level completed: 22%, Points required for next Level: 39
    Overall activity: 35.0%
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    10
    Points
    61
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    6

    Default SOI from her then freezes me out

    I will start a text/Fb conversation, it moves through a couple topics, I dhv and she makes a statement along the lines of

    "I like that [about you]"
    "I like that you are a ____. I knew there was something about you!"

    Conversation continues for a little bit.

    Later, when I try to initiate another conversation (even with a witty opener) I get entirely frozen out, no response again or 1-word responses and total apathy.

    Last woman - I asked her what made her message me after years then seem non-talkative. She said she is really busy and I didn't respond. Whatever, you're never too busy for a short message to people you like.

    I've ran into this issue about 3 times so far and I'm starting to think I'm doing something terribly wrong.

  2. #2
    xavier's Avatar
    xavier is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 15,104, Level: 79
    Level completed: 51%, Points required for next Level: 246
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social31 days registered10000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Paris, France
    Posts
    1,120
    Points
    15,104
    Level
    79
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 15 Times in 15 Posts
    Rep Power
    667

    Default Re: SOI from her then freezes me out

    No you aren't. Shit happens. Deal with it. What I would do though is make them feel like its always now or never with you Roll Off more, punish bad behavior ...
    "The world will never change much less become what you want it to be. The only thing that can change is you. Face your fears, grow stronger and become what you want to be."
    _Xavier.

  3. #3
    SirisBFF is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 61, Level: 1
    Level completed: 22%, Points required for next Level: 39
    Overall activity: 35.0%
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    10
    Points
    61
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    6

    Default Re: SOI from her then freezes me out

    Thanks Xavier.

    I will admit I am not so great with rolling off over text. Also, how do people punish bad behavior for texting/messaging? The messaging usually happens no more than once every other day or couple days anyway.... I fear if I punish bad behavior by ignoring them for 3-4 days all the momentum will be dead.

  4. #4
    Kvn07 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 538, Level: 10
    Level completed: 76%, Points required for next Level: 12
    Overall activity: 12.0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered500 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Posts
    156
    Points
    538
    Level
    10
    Thanks
    7
    Thanked 7 Times in 7 Posts
    Rep Power
    32

    Default Re: SOI from her then freezes me out

    She likes something about you or something you did.. so what?! She has to like you!What are your conversations about? Are they fun & flirty or just your regular, boring old conversations that she can have with anyone?

    If you go NC for that long then, yes, you're going to kill any momentum.. especiallyif you end the conversation on a bad note by way of trying to 'punish' her.

    If you post some conversations it might make it easier to see why.

  5. #5
    SirisBFF is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 61, Level: 1
    Level completed: 22%, Points required for next Level: 39
    Overall activity: 35.0%
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    10
    Points
    61
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    6

    Default Re: SOI from her then freezes me out

    Alright, so here is the conversation after which I only got 1-word answers. It felt like after I was complimented the conversation was pretty much going nowhere.

    Background is I already asked her when she wants to come out to my town (40 min drive for her) to "grab drinks and let me shamelessly flirt with her" and she said "Not sure soon tho" so I took that as a I-need-some-more-comfort-before-that-happens.

    Me:Random Question: what's your guilty pleasure?

    7:Hmmmm....(Thinking ...Massages!Yours?

    ME:I don't see why you'd feel guilty about that:P I feel really guilty about mine.... promise you won't judge? lol

    7:I promise!

    Me:I love stupid pop songs

    7:Hahaha

    Me:Give me some Katy Perry or Kesha and I'm content lol

    7:I can be a sucker for some of those catchy tunes also!
    The reason why I said massages are right guilty pleasure is because they can get quite expensive!
    Last year I bought a year supply with the massages lol

    Me: Do only professional massages do it for you?

    7:No way! Any really unless the person doesn't know what they're doing.
    I am a very touchy type of person.

    Me:Me too!

    7:Yeah?

    Me:Usually I hold back from touching people

    7:Lol how come?

    Me: Because I know ppl in Michigan are usually more distant than what I'm used to

    7: Oh, good point!

    Me: Where I'm from when people meet every guy shakes hands
    Girls kiss on each cheek
    That kind of thing

    7:Where are you from?

    Me: I am from a small town in blabla country..

    7: Awesome! Didn't know that!
    Do you speak the language then? I know a few words

    Me:Yes, I grew up there! Moved to Michigan when I was 18. What words do you know?

    7: a few words in foreign language.

    7:Not sure if I spelled that right
    Ummm
    more words in foreign language.

    Me: You just told me to fuck off.....

    7: Did I? Hahaha
    Really?
    I had a boss years ago who was from blabla country who taught me some.

    Me: Lol no, I'm just joking around

    7:Lol

    Me:That is cool tho. Are you from Michign?

    7:Yes, I am. However, I am quite different in some ways. My dad is yadda yadda grew up in a yadda yadda manner.
    I like that you are of blabla nationality. I knew there was something about you!

    Me:Haha thanks!
    I knew you weren't a typical michigander either
    you're more open, friendly and (now i know) touchy than the rest

    7:Thanks for the compliment!

    Me:So what was different about growing up with a yadda yadda nationality dad?
    Some interesting cooking I bet

    7:Yes, food for sure. I guess a lot of little things
    Just a bit more "old fashioned" or traditional
    Hard to put my finger on specific things
    Maybe what we valued in life
    Less self entitlement.. Most Americans are too self entitled in my opinion.

    Me:I strongly agree with the last part
    Especially as someone who got here with nothing but the clothes on his back and $50
    (I spent the $50 promptly on a decent pair of shoes....)

    7:Lol! only $50!?

    Me:Surprised that I spent so little on shoes??

    7:Ha! No, so little starting in a new life in a new country!

    Me:Yes, it was quite a trip.
    I was lucky that my parents were with me at the time

    7:I bet!!!

    Me:They pretty muxh forbid me from working after we found an apartment
    And told me that I need to stay in college.... And after a while I was doing both anyway!

    7:Good that he gave you that focus!

    Me:Well I am definitely happy with my current spot in life
    What are you up to today btw?

    7:Taxes

    Me:Sounds riveting. Good luck


    Eventually I just gave up on it and blew up on her because I was having a rough week and felt like taking it out on someone. So I am not really interested in pursuing this 7 but I would like to pick some more people's brains about situations like these.

  6. #6
    xavier's Avatar
    xavier is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 15,104, Level: 79
    Level completed: 51%, Points required for next Level: 246
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social31 days registered10000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Paris, France
    Posts
    1,120
    Points
    15,104
    Level
    79
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 15 Times in 15 Posts
    Rep Power
    667

    Default Re: SOI from her then freezes me out

    I see nothing wrong with this however I would have explained more about your journey in america put it some hooking words like I discovered I felt passionate about I feared.

    Talk to her !!!
    "The world will never change much less become what you want it to be. The only thing that can change is you. Face your fears, grow stronger and become what you want to be."
    _Xavier.

  7. #7
    drgnsfire12 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 3,671, Level: 38
    Level completed: 14%, Points required for next Level: 129
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    1000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Location
    New York, New York
    Posts
    588
    Points
    3,671
    Level
    38
    Thanks
    5
    Thanked 37 Times in 36 Posts
    Rep Power
    181

    Default Re: SOI from her then freezes me out

    Well you were certainly building comfort with her ..... but why would you blow up on her ??? ........ I know you said you don't want to pursue her now but what's wrong with making a female friend , they make good wings and they have girlfriends, it's a good networking move .... I have girls in my life that are drinking buddies, dinner buddies, and texting buddies and I really enjoy that
    "The purpose of our lives is to be happy" - his Holiness the Dalai Llama of Tibet

  8. #8
    SirisBFF is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 61, Level: 1
    Level completed: 22%, Points required for next Level: 39
    Overall activity: 35.0%
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    10
    Points
    61
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    6

    Default Re: SOI from her then freezes me out

    Oh dude, I have plenty of friends female or not. I weighed how much satisfaction I would get from any relationship with this person and decided I'd get more satisfaction out of just telling her off

    Thanks for the advice anyway guys, seems like this will stay a mystery! Maybe I was not that attractive to her or text/online game is not my strong suit. I still prefer to call/meetup at least that way you can feel someone's energy

  9. #9
    Kvn07 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 538, Level: 10
    Level completed: 76%, Points required for next Level: 12
    Overall activity: 12.0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered500 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Posts
    156
    Points
    538
    Level
    10
    Thanks
    7
    Thanked 7 Times in 7 Posts
    Rep Power
    32

    Default Re: SOI from her then freezes me out

    Why would you get satisfaction from telling someone off? That just makes you a look like a toddler throwing a tantrum because you didn't get what you want.. people don't owe you anything, so don't get upset because you don't get your way.

    Now, generally, this is the point where I would say to myself "this guy's a d1ck & I'm done trying to help" but in the interest of helping (and let's face it, I had the same attitude years ago too) I'll throw my two cents in on the original question.

    You didn't build any attraction nor did you display any higher value! You started out well but fell into comfort building pretty quickly. Being from another country is cool and exciting but once you had answered her questions there wasn't much left for her to be excited about. Personally, I would have tried to save some of that talk for when you met in person.

    7:No way! Any really unless the person doesn't know what they're doing.
    I am a very touchy type of person.
    You: Well we'll have to see if you can seduce me into giving you one of my super amazing massages one day
    This was a big ioi here!! So many ways to steer the conversation to something sexual and getting her to want to meet up with you!!

    7: Did I? Hahaha
    Really?
    I had a boss years ago who was from blabla country who taught me some.
    You: Yes, and I don't know that I'm going to let you come and hang out with me if you're going to continue being rude like that lol

    7:Thanks for the compliment!
    You: You're welcome.. don't go getting any ideas though!

    There's a few quick examples of how you can be a little flirtier with your responses. If she responds positively then you can ramp it up and be a little more bold.

    Real life interactions are always a better option, but not all girls are totally comfortable with it straight away. And remember everybody's going through their own stuff. If they don't reply straight away or ever for that matter, don't be a dick about it, re-open after a few days with a brand new topic and if they still don't respond then it's their loss, not yours.


Similar Threads

  1. she freezes out = shi1t test?
    By rocoloco in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 04-23-2013, 03:26 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com