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  1. #1
    Thrill is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Need Text Advice: Girl Chasing Me Now "kinda wifed-up lol"

    Background: I'm keeping this as concise as possible. Exactly a year ago at WMC (look it up if you don't know; it's amazing for parties and picking up chicks), I picked up an HB9 from Florida ("Florida girl") at a beach party. We kept in touch because she said that she was planning to move to NYC where I live. She moved here early last fall. We hung out once or twice during the day and made out each time. I could've slept with her, but at the time, I had a female friend temporarily staying in my apartment who was always around when I brought the girl over, so it didn't happen. Also, I never made her my priority because I was seeing another girl at the time who eventually became my girlfriend, at which point, I stopped reaching out to Florida girl. About once a month, though, Florida girl (not knowing that I had a girlfriend) would text me, and I would respond to keep the lines of communication open but never made plans to meet her because I was in a relationship.

    Now: Now that I'm single again, I decided to reach out to her. About a week ago, she posted a picture on Instagram of her and her friends at the party where I met her, so I commented "good times ". She comment back that I was a stranger and she couldn't believe that we live in the same city and haven't hung out in forever. So I texted her something along the lines of (I deleted my text history with her so all I have is her last text): "Calling me a stranger on insta huh? haha How about this: i won't be a stranger if you text me back when i respond to your texts ya weirdo ;-P". From there, we texted back and forth for a couple days. My last text to her was something along the lines of "speaking of partying, where've you been going out lately?" Then that night or the next night, she said, "Sorry I was at work. I've been laying off the partying. I'm kinda wifed-up these days lol."

    Later that Saturday morning, I had to take a standardized exam, which she knew about, so I was MIA. Afterward, I got a new iPhone so I could easily play off that I never got her last text, which is what I'm leaning toward doing because the generally strategy is to ignore the first mention of a boyfriend. She's definitely interested because: 1) she said "kinda wife-up lol," meaning she's not officially or doesn't want to tell me that she is official; 2) she's texting me now; and 3) she's been texting me monthly for the last six months. I feel like I'm that guy that keeps getting away, a challenge she wants to win.

    So, my first question is, how do I respond? I was thinking of, "Hey, I got a new iPhone last weekend so I lost a bunch of texts. I'm sure you were worried that I was ignoring you, so I want to let you know that you shouldn't worry. I wasn't ;-P " What do you guys think? In case this helps, she's the type of girl who fronts like she's a good girl, but I know that she isn't because 1) I've heard stories, and 2) I've learned that a girl who claims to be a "good girl" is DEFINITELY NOT a good girl.

    Second
    , in anticipation of her bringing up that guy again, should I run a boyfriend destroyer? Normally, I'd say, "I'm not asking you on a date, just inviting you to hang out," but because of our history, I'm sure she knows better. Then again, saying that it's not a date might allow her to justify/rationalize in her mind that she could go out with me. Thoughts?

    Thanks!

    -- Thrill.

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to Thrill For This Useful Post:

    drgnsfire12 (04-06-2015)

  3. #2
    ConnorMaxwell72 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Need Text Advice: Girl Chasing Me Now "kinda wifed-up lol"

    I'll be honest, her saying "I'm kind of wifed up" is her really being nice to you. You missed the boat on her, and she's being nice to you. She's also probably leaving the door slightly open, and turning you into an orbiter (or the fall back guy) if things don't work out with her current boyfriend... which really isn't a position you want to be in. Boyfriend destroyer could work, but there's also a reason you haven't met or seen this guy - she's probably doing that deliberately so that you don't know if he really exists or not. Really, that turns you into the guy being played and you're not in a position of power.

    Personally, I'd cut my loses and find another HB9. You don't want to be "the other guy", let alone be a "plan b" or "fallback". And think about it this way: What happens if Boyfriend destroyer works, she breaks up with him (or cheats on him with you), and you get together? She's already shown the capacity of doing that with you, do you think she really won't do that again with some OTHER guy and leaving you being how her current phantom boyfriend is?

    Plain and simple, I'd just text her and say "Text me when you're single". It's more of a power and play and doesn't waste your time on a girl that's either A: Playing you, or B: Not interested in you to begin with and is just being nice.

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to ConnorMaxwell72 For This Useful Post:

    Thrill (04-05-2015)

  5. #3
    Thrill is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Need Text Advice: Girl Chasing Me Now "kinda wifed-up lol"

    Thanks. I know very well not to seriously date a girl who would leave another guy for me. She's not someone I want a relationship with.

    Since I have nothing to lose because I'm not into this chick anyway (just find her very attractive), I took your advice. It's been about a week or two since she last texted me, and I never responded. So I just texted, "Hey, I gotta new phone after my exam so I'm still getting delayed texts. Just got your last text. Text me when ur single." She immediately texted back "It's like that? Lol" So I'm gonna run with this a bit.


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