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Thread: How am I doing?

  1. #1
    BruJu is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default How am I doing?

    Some background: I'm 30 y/o and she's 27. We messed around when we were teenagers but haven't spoken until last week. She is single and pretty close to a perfect 10 imho. I'm good looking (attractive women have told me I look like Brad Pitt, or Leo DiCaprio when my hair was longer) but am in the process of dealing with some inner-game issues.

    So I found her on Facebook last week. She gave me her # after a couple e-mails, we sent a few texts, then we had an hour-long phone conversation (which I was the one to end).

    That brings me to today...I texted her saying I'm going to this place to eat by the ocean with some friends and she should join us. She didn't respond, though I semi-expected that because she works until 8PM. The conversation picks up later that evening...

    Me: Hey nerdball...u giving me the silent treatment or is your shift at (local strip-club) really THAT busy tonight?

    (Note: she used to work as a go-go dancer, not a Stripper...but that doesn't stop me from pretending otherwise hehe)

    Her: ha! Ya I was busy...you've never been to (place I invited her to) b4?!?!

    Me: Of course I have! Went there tonight and u missed out sucka!

    Her: you ate in the rain?

    Me: we ate inside and goofed around in the rain. One girl melted, but she was a witch anyway.

    Her: Ha!

    Me: Nah...I just forgot what night you have off. Took a shot.

    Her: oh. lol!

    Me: Don't refresh my memory or anything. Geez!

    Her: varies. usually Thureday.

    Me: Hmmm...I'm busy tomorrow but not Thurs. Come check out this new lounge with me that night. Would still love the chance to catch up with you in person. You just have to promise to behave yourself.

    Her: Wil see. I'm working late Thursday. (after she just told me she usually has Thursdays off! WTF!?!)

    Me: I can't do the maybe thing. What time you getting off?

    Her: lol. I don't kno

    -At this point I called her to bust on her over the phone, but she didn't answer.

    Me: I forgot you're not allowed calls after 9PM

    Her: Ya...and I don't like talking on the phone anyway.

    Me: Why? You have a beautiful voice.

    No response for 5 min., then we message each other simultaneously...

    Her: Eh idk lol

    Me: Note to self: call her a nerdball and she answers you. Give her a compliment and she doesn't know what to say.

    Her: Haha. So true!

    I ended the convo there...

    Looking back at it I would say I didn't create any sexual tension and, despite the fact that we messed around all those years ago, I'm probably getting close to the friend zone. Agree? Disagree? And what should I do to get to the next level with her?
    Last edited by BruJu; 08-14-2011 at 05:40 AM.

  2. #2
    studmuffin52 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How am I doing?

    I like it .. it's very playful, not personal and you definately have her attention.. now quickly try to arrange a meeting with her and try escalating things.

  3. #3
    BruJu is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How am I doing?

    Thank you. Getting her ass to set a date in stone is I want help with.

    What do you suggest to get around that "Wil see" crap?

  4. #4
    studmuffin52 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How am I doing?

    whenever a girl saids she'll let me know or we'll see.... my instant response is, "let me know a few days you're free because my agenda is getting packed, that way I can slot you in. "

    or something upfront like.. "I got plans for you Wednesday, you good then?" if she saids "no" then simply reply "cool, have fun" but otherwise, let her know where to meet you then.

  5. #5
    BruJu is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How am I doing?

    I gotcha.

    In this case she wouldn't commit to Thursday so I let her know right away that "maybe" doesn't cut it. I was being very careful here because the mistake I made in the past would be to say, "ok, then how about Friday? No? What about Saturday? Busy then too huh...well let me know what day you are free and we can hang out". Now that I'm dealing with my inner game issues the neediness is going away but I wasn't sure what to replace it with to get the result I wanted (a date).

    Maybe I'm taking her objection (and lack of counter-proposal) too seriously here. Should I only worry if she turns me down another time or two?

    I'm still going to search the forum for material to help close the date and bust through objections women typically come up with. Let me know if you have any threads to recommend.

    Thank you.

  6. #6
    studmuffin52 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How am I doing?

    I'd say if she saids no or she's "busy", wait 4-5 days before asking her again, send minimal text in that time, because if you still communicate with her having her said no = dlv

    closing a date is fairly simple, be original and ask her to do somehting special on the first time out again .. movie dinner is a little too casual/common .. maybe glow-in-the-dark mini golf .... i took this girl to laser tag and she had an amazing time despite it's generally for kids.. but it was me and her versus another couple for 20 minutes.. we destroyed the other couple...

    back on track, you may have taken it a little too seriously, and if she noticed it, you will appear too caring.

    to get the result you want, you need to communicate with her, funny chats are good, but you need to make it to target answers you want!! for example, if you want first date ideas.. make it into a conversation....

    example:
    you: I am sick and tired of those regular sushi restaurants.. have u tried those one where u kneel and eat?>
    her: OMG! no! I wanna try
    you: calm down.. I'll take you sometime then.
    her: cool
    you: speaking of kneeling, do you have strong knees?
    her: dirty minded.. naughty youuuuu
    you: i was being caring about the nature of the meal ... get your head out of the gutter!!
    her: whoopsie...

    .. goes on for a while...

    that was one text chat i had 1 month ago...

  7. #7
    BruJu is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How am I doing?

    That helps a lot actually. Thanks for the help at 2:20AM.


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