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  • 1 Post By nik

Thread: what to do when girl's been in an abusive relationship?

  1. #1
    aesthethic brah is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default what to do when girl's been in an abusive relationship?

    I met this girl online and everything was going great. We talked for about a month on the phone/emails before we met up. A few days ago when we met she told me she's been in an physically abusive relationship. Although we got along GREAT on the date (she asked to go somewhere and make out with me and wanted to have sex) she said she didn't want a relationship. I talked to her and explained what I thought was going on and told her that she might be scared because she likes me more than she had anticipated and now feels vulnerable so she feels the need to push me away. She agreed and I told her that obviously she's not yet healed and should seek professional help. I really like this girl, but need a second opinion on the next steps. Should I forget about her altogether or just keep dating other people, but see where things go with her?

  2. #2
    Eltoro is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: what to do when girl's been in an abusive relations

    I'd just be careful bro. I had a similar situation with a girl from work. She'd been in a shit relationship for 6yrs and has a 2yo daughter with him. She was super emotional and always said she didn't want a relationship. But always acted like we were in one always hot and cold. But sex with her was amazing she always liked it rough slapping/choking/gaging hair pulling...good stuff. I ended up catching feelings...she ended up going back to that guy.

  3. #3
    Fratstar is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: what to do when girl's been in an abusive relationship?

    Keep dating other girls bro. Tell her its good she's not looking for a relationship, because neither are you. Pretend like you want nothing from her, and she'll want more from you. Push-Pull

  4. #4
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: what to do when girl's been in an abusive relationship?

    Frat-star is semi right. DO NOT try to get together with this woman and do not expect it. Just get the sex from her. She feels a void in her heart and thinks she can fill it with you. She is going to you for what she isn't getting out of her current relationship. My advice, honestly, if you can get it elsewhere is to just stay away from this one, and tell her that if she gets her life straightened out you would like to see her and go your separate ways.

  5. #5
    combatbreathing is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: what to do when girl's been in an abusive relationship?

    what to do likely, is to leave her, i just dumped a crazy psycho bitch because shed been sh1t on by like 40 dudes, not my problem, or so i thought. She cheated on me and lied about everything. The bitch is damaged goods beyond repair with a buttload of baggage, im guessing yours is too.

  6. #6
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    Torres1 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: what to do when girl's been in an abusive relationship?

    All I'd suggest is leave her better than you found her. This is one of the instances in which I see a person has suffered and I feel for them. Dont go be her dam psychologist but Game her and just have a good times with her and see where it goes. Don't kiss ass either though, she will want to be around you.

  7. #7
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    nik
    nik is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: what to do when girl's been in an abusive relationship?

    Quote Originally Posted by Torres1 View Post
    All I'd suggest is leave her better than you found her. This is one of the instances in which I see a person has suffered and I feel for them. Dont go be her dam psychologist but Game her and just have a good times with her and see where it goes. Don't kiss ass either though, she will want to be around you.
    Good post. Especially, the first sentence.

    You will find that most women have been in an abusive relationship of one type, or another, at one time, or another. How bad was the abuse and how did it affect her all have to be taken into consideration on a case by case basis.

    Some women become more nurturing and caring. Others become resentful and mean. You cannot lump them all together.

    To those of you automatically labelling her as "damaged goods", you are likely missing out on some great women.

    For the record, a woman doesn't need a reason, or excuse, to be bat crazy.

    One of the top three most beautiful women I ever dated was, at one time, in a physically abusive relationship that led to her having a gun in her face by a drug dealer. Afterward, her boyfriend, the reason behind the dealer's issue, beat her severely , to remind her of what would happen if she told anyone. In the brief time we dated, there were some extra considerations that I made, but nothing that awas an imposition. She was, in every way, worth the efforts beyond the regular pickup.

    Yes, I have seen the other side, too.

    Judge people on an individual basis by their deeds.
    I have failed more than most men have tried.

    Every woman you pass up is a woman you will never have.


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