LR: "Put Your Thingy Shield On."

What's up you Creeps?!

Lately I've been taking my promoting gig less serious and playing more with the pua stuff even though the promoting stuff is what keeps me fed. Still surfing couches, but y'know.

My boy Flightdeck went out of town on business and asked me to house sit and watch his puppy he just got. So I said sure. I mean he's the newest member to Casanova Crew Orange County, dude lets me hold the Lair meetings here. Really chill mufarker. Pulls fly ass Asian hunnies. Okay, okay enough DHVing the weirdo.

So as he's leaving I'm standing there telling him I'm going on a rampage this weekend and gonna see what happens. He looks and me and tells me, "Handle business, son." LOL!

That's the thing I like about the seduction community. When you tell your buddy you're gonna hook up with a few hunnies at his pad, he tells ya, "Go for it, just clean the sheets." If you tell a normal friend that's NOT a player they say some sh1t like, "Not here you're not."

WTF?!

Back to business...

I set up a night w/ Ms. LMR from my field report "FR: Dear LMR, Oh How I've Missed You!". I had a IM convo with her telling me to find a room and get a box of condoms. LOL! While she's still talking to me, I made a phone call, got the room and told her. She's like, "Damn you work fast."

LOL!!

After a few days I'm telling her that we're chilling and that she's coming over to "hang out." She's chill w/ that and it's on.

We text back and forth throughout the week about chilling after I get off work at the club on Friday, which was last night.

I text her while I'm at the club telling her that I'm leaving at midnight to head back to the pad.

No response.

Then I get a text saying, "Just got out of the movies."

I text back saying I'll see her in a bit.

Right before midnight at around 11:30 I text saying I'm leaving now.

She texts back, "sh1t...Bowling"

I'm think to myself, "JEEEEEEEEZUS!" At this point I'm thinking that I could call my ex back over so I know it's a for sure night of getting laid. But then she text me that she's almost done with their game and that she'll be on her way when they're done.

On my way to the crib I call the girl who I was crashing with and started talking about blow jobs. She said she was really tempted to do it right then and there but she wasn't near her place and was with her friend at a random house.

ALMOST!

I get to the pad and hop online until Ms. LMR gets here. Once she's here I throw the movie "Waiting" in and get into cuddle mode.

Here's the LMR I got...AGAIN!

I'm running my hands errrrrrwhere on her body and my hands get grabbed. I grab her hands to hold them. I let go to start running my hands everywhere again. Again, they get grabbed. :x

We're still watching the movie and spooning, I'M BIG SPOON of course. I start to pass out and she notices. After a few light elbows from her I sit up and go in for the kill. Make out pops off and she starts to shift her body and all of the sudden she's on top.

She realizes the blinds are semi open and wants them shut so I just grab her hand and lead her to the bedroom.

I get in the room, sit on the bed and pull her into me for a kiss. My hands start to go errrrrwhere again and her hands are blocking me...AGAIN! :cry:

Literally I just stopped and wasn't gonna go any further, her LMR is SO farkING INSANE it's seriously not worth fighting. Head moving out the way, hands stopping the touching, body shifting here n' there.

You start to think to yourself, "Why the fark am I wasting my time right now." I thought about the time and it was just about 2 in the morning and I knew my ex was up and would drive over to get some.

So I wasn't too pissed but I was pretty upset. Once I stopped and put my dropped jaw on her shoulder to breathe and take it all in, she stops and says, "Are you pissed?" I tell her no of course and THEN she says, "I can't see your facial expression but I'd like know what it looks like."

Why is that? LOL!! I tell her, "No, I'm fine, you weirdo." She starts to feel to see how my face is, LOL!! I felt like she was a blind lady figuring out what I look like.

Once she's done seeing if I'm mad she pushes me back and jumps on top. WTF?!

A few minutes in I lift her shirt, unsnap her bra and start putting my hands down the back of her jeans to feel her ass. YUM!

For some reason at a certain point girls clothes just start flying off it's not even funny. You almost don't have to work for it any more and they're all over you.

Some girls it takes very little work and others too much at times. The effort on this one was almost too much but she started to grind and then finally she hopped off of me and removed her jeans.

I remove mine and we start grinding on one another. She wants to switch positions with me grinding on top.

The grinding is getting old so I start kissing and licking on her neck and then start to make my way down to her belly and once I get to her lower belly she stops me and pulls me back up.

She tells me that she's not use to all this stuff.

I guess she dated one dude for 9 years and hasn't really messed around with anybody since him.

We continue to grind then finally she says to me, "Put your thingy shield on." A thingy shield?! I've never heard a condom called a "thingy shield." LOL!!

I grab the rubber and she makes me get on the bottom, I slide in and we go at it.

I'm literally sitting up against the head board, she's leaning against me but holding onto the wood on the bed grinding while I lick on her chest.

I bust and we're down for the count.

No second round, didn't even get breakfast sex which would have been yummy. She was about to leave and I kept moving my head towards the room and smiling all big. LOL! She was laughing but saying no.

Once she got to a gas station near her house I get a text saying....

Ms. LMR - Should have taken 2nd round. fark

LOL!!!

THINGS I LEARNED -

LMR is a bitch, but never give up. Even if you get too frustrated with it. You learn something from everything so getting frustrated is silly.

Vietnamese girls are TINY!

It's cheaper to buy a pack of 12 condoms than it was 2 packs of 3. LOL!!! They're the same price! Jeezus.

Another day, another holler.

-Hydro