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Running Out Of Things To Say

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  #1  
Old 01-04-2010, 12:24 AM
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I was out recently, I approached a few women this night. Keep in mind, I'm QUITE new to the whole PUA thing, and am still at essence a afc trying to learn my way up the ranks. Anyways, first group, I felt a natural chemistry, numerous IOIs, used false time constraint, however I failed in retrieving a number from my intended target. Second group, I opened sloppy, simply said, "hey how are you doing tonight?" followed by some playful jokes however it seemed like everything I said to this girl pretty much ended up with awkward pauses in the conversation, at this point I left.

The last woman I talked to this night, I ended up seeing her smile at me, I approached her, talked to her quickly, brought her back to were I was initialy sitting -- I was with another friend. Anyways, I started out, and the chemistry was on and off, I had a few playful jokes up my sleeve, teasing her implying we could never be together, telling her she was my new best friend, however, I find after awhile, I start to lose some of my charm and begin to feel awkward, with again, awkward pauses. At the moment, I still experience approach anxiety, so these were few sets that I approached and it ends with clearly varied results as you can tell. Anyone have any pointers or tips? I run out of things to say quite often when talking to women, and end up saying whatever comes to mind. Which results in me sounding boring. Thanks guys in advance!

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  #2  
Old 01-04-2010, 12:29 AM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

Practice makes perfect! I'm tempted to say you're rushing things (like bringing her to where you were without enough ammo in your arsenal) but maybe you really are just new to the game, are not yet comfy chatting women up, etc. So practice, practice, practice

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  #3  
Old 01-04-2010, 01:32 AM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

Not trying to hi jack your thread, i think im in a similar boat to you. i have a couple of openers that seem to be ok, other than the hi how you going.. i find that i end up saying hi how are you, and then if i dont get a smile, i go for a small neg, or simply say its a (what day it is) how come your not smiling?
if she smiles or starts telling your (trying to convince you) about herself then i take that as an ioi and proceeed from there.

i stick to exciting questions. and positive lines. like what do u do for fun. and inquisitive questions. so if i was your boyfriend where would u take me to dinner?

if you find urself really stuck for small talk, ask if she likes dogs or cats. then tell or make up an interesting story about her preferance,

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  #4  
Old 01-04-2010, 01:48 AM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

Firstly, I don't think you're hijacking the thread. You're being quite polite about jumping in. In my limited experience it's tough to say whether women would rather you just came up to them and said 'Hi, I'm [insert].." and run from there, or whether you went with something that makes you stand out. I'd say it's best to pick you're target. If you're batting low (7.5 and lower) justy play it as yourself. If you want to take it to the big leagues, Make yourself 'different', using whatever you've got. Just remember, even a 10 is just a woman, and if she turns out to be a cow, hit it and quit it. You're better than that.

For more in-depth advice, speak to one of the big-names here. Bill and Instinct are good in my experience.

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  #5  
Old 01-04-2010, 04:24 AM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

Quote:
Originally Posted by OverTheEdge View Post
I was out recently, I approached a few women this night. Keep in mind, I'm QUITE new to the whole PUA thing, and am still at essence a afc trying to learn my way up the ranks. Anyways, first group, I felt a natural chemistry, numerous IOIs, used false time constraint, however I failed in retrieving a number from my intended target. Second group, I opened sloppy, simply said, "hey how are you doing tonight?" followed by some playful jokes however it seemed like everything I said to this girl pretty much ended up with awkward pauses in the conversation, at this point I left.

The last woman I talked to this night, I ended up seeing her smile at me, I approached her, talked to her quickly, brought her back to were I was initialy sitting -- I was with another friend. Anyways, I started out, and the chemistry was on and off, I had a few playful jokes up my sleeve, teasing her implying we could never be together, telling her she was my new best friend, however, I find after awhile, I start to lose some of my charm and begin to feel awkward, with again, awkward pauses. At the moment, I still experience approach anxiety, so these were few sets that I approached and it ends with clearly varied results as you can tell. Anyone have any pointers or tips? I run out of things to say quite often when talking to women, and end up saying whatever comes to mind. Which results in me sounding boring. Thanks guys in advance!

I say practice, practice, and keep on practicing. It's okay to fark up things when you play your game. You are still new to picking up women. Try to think what are the things that women tend to be interested in you. What openers have more responses? Develop your weakness. If you have buddy who is an expert or just good in picking up women, seek for advice.

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  #6  
Old 01-04-2010, 06:29 PM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

Excellent work getting up the balls to start approaching. I think you are experiencing something I used to experience. You go in, and start hitting the sets, but you get nervous so you end up falling back on your canned lines. After you run out of those, you don't know where to go. Relax. Let the conversation flow where it may. Pick up on what she says and take that thread. After you have built some attraction, you no longer have to lead the conversation. Say something light, sit back, and look at her calmly but expectantly. She will pick up the ball. Remember, always give either funny or descriptive responses when she asks you things. You want to give her something to work with. If you are kinoing, a slight pass is always a good time to escalate in a very deliberate manner, or give her a look.

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  #7  
Old 01-05-2010, 02:17 AM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

Xplode... cool idea, those situational questions. I'll try to remember that next time I use a gay opener. But now I'd word it like, "If I were gay, who do you think I'd look like?"

Thanks, man.

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  #8  
Old 01-05-2010, 04:38 AM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

If you're running out of things to say, you can use gay opener as what culturedpearls mentioned. It is funny and sets a light mood. I once used it when I was hanging out with this chic in school. We talk a lot about stuff. As much as I try to keep the conversation alive and open, there are times that I just went out of ideas. So, I used the gay opener and she laughed and laughed.

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  #9  
Old 01-05-2010, 09:17 AM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

I think everyone hit most of the main points here, but one other thing you could do is read lots of books. A well read man will always have something to talk about. You just need to find a topic that is interesting to most people, like psychology or something. As everyone else said though, the main thing is practice. The more comfortable you are talking to women the easier it will be to avoid the awkward silences and such. If you feel you are having some approach anxiety, go out in town and try to make conversation with at least 5 strangers a day, man or woman. That should help you get over that AA.

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  #10  
Old 01-05-2010, 09:23 AM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

Quote:
Originally Posted by Smash View Post
I think everyone hit most of the main points here, but one other thing you could do is read lots of books. A well read man will always have something to talk about. You just need to find a topic that is interesting to most people, like psychology or something. As everyone else said though, the main thing is practice. The more comfortable you are talking to women the easier it will be to avoid the awkward silences and such. If you feel you are having some approach anxiety, go out in town and try to make conversation with at least 5 strangers a day, man or woman. That should help you get over that AA.
Reps.

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  #11  
Old 01-05-2010, 04:19 PM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

Great discussion guys. The more I read the experiences of the guys on this forum, the more I can see some of you are using the information that Nick taught us from my Ignite The Night product.

If you haven't checked it out yet, you can see it here:

PUA Forums Presents: Ignite The Night

Cheers,
Bill Preston

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  #12  
Old 01-07-2010, 11:11 AM
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Default Re: Running Out Of Things To Say

If you don't like reading books, at least keep yourself abreast of the news. Don't raise serious, no-fun topics though. Check out the latest 'funniest videos' in Youtube at least.

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