My First Field Report - Failures and Success

I wrote success because it is the beginning of a long road to improving my skills with women. It was definitely a good step and I learnt a lot from the interactions. But it was a failure because none really went anywhere and kind of fizzled out. Here is my interactions, any comments are appreciated.

We started off the night quite late. I went with a friend of mine who is in town (tel aviv) for a few weeks. Me being English and him American we thought we would talk in English as the lure of foreigners can sometimes work (especially an English accent).

We stopped first at a sandwich bar and I straight away opened a small set. Three girls on rollerblades promoting something and two older girls listening. We started chatting and I negged the rollerblade girls saying they were too young. Straight away they turned and left. The two older girls were more interested to speak to us but the conversation resorted to where we and they were from. They got there food and left. Not bad as a warm-up but there was nothing there.

We hit the first bar and straight away walked into a group of girls. I asked them about drunk 'i love yous' and they were keen for about 2 minutes and then a smaller group behind us started talking to us. In this smaller group was a birthday girl and we realised all the girls were there for her party. They were kinda interested but then left. Only one stayed who was interested but was pretty ugly. My friend offered to buy her a drink (I know) and then we talked to her for a bit. No point two guys talking to her so I kind of drifted away. Eventually we said goodbye and we left to find a seat.

We then found these two really cute girls. I opened again with the 'i love you' sms and then responded quite well. My friend joined in and I thought we were doing pretty well. We were standing at the edge of their table and waiters kept going past and eventually someone said we were standing in a bad place. I said ok, so is it ok if we sit down with you? they kind of hesistated for a split second but it seemed as if they didn't really mind. At that EXACT same time this guy tried to push past me and I stood my ground. He then said these girls are taken and that they were in a business meeting so we cant join. Basically they were their boyfriends and i would back off but this guy was being an asshole and trying to out-alpha male us and show how cool he was. I said it didn't look like they were in a business meeting and my friend said anyway, we can tell when we are not wanted and so we left. My mate then went to talk to them for a second as the girls got up to go to the bathroom and apologised for hitting on his girls. I didn't.

We hit on the waitresses as well. There was the main one and another girl who was shadowing them. I asked them who lies more guys or girls and they played along for a minute but then the main waitress left (she was cuter) and the shadow waitress stayed. She seemed to like us but eventually said she better go because it was her first day and didn't want to get fired.

We got up and walked a few yards and saw two girls sitting. I opened again with the drunk i love yous (while writing this i realise i need more openers) and while initially hesitant to talk to us they warmed up. I moved to the who lies more and they carried on. Two other girls came and sat down with them. I got them involved but then after a minute or so of carrying on the who lies more line i had no idea how to move it on. We said goodbye and went to sit at a table behind them. One of them looked at us with eyes that seemed to say hmm you shouldn't have left but im not sure. We sat in our seats for a drink and then left the bar.

We went to another bar and i started speaking to a couple. She was from england and very happy to speak to me but she was with a guy who seemed really nice and he had a look of dude you are raining on my parade. I think they had been on a date and he looked like a good guy so i didn't want to impose. We chatted for a couple of minutes and i included the guy in the convo. We then left and went outside.

Outside we two tables of two girls. We approached one (the uglier of the two which was a mistake). One of the girls was cute(ISH) and the other pretty ugly. We chatted for a couple of minutes and the cuter one invited us to a private party tomorrow night which she said was for special guys. I said my friend was a special guy and she said no, you are. I thought that was a little harsh on my mate and he looked a little gutted at the comment. He is a top dude as well and pretty good looking. I said im not sure as we have a friend who owns the top club in the city who has invited us tomorrow night so we will see. We then left and went to sit down. Behind us we could see a group of guys tried to hit on them badly and failed. Once they left we went back in and I said here write down the details of the place tomorrow and we will see. I then asked the two cuter girls sitting next to them if they had a pen. They seemed to dhv us and the guys were all looking as well as the two cute girls who seemed impressed. We got the details of the club (no phone number though...) and left. My friend told me that when i went to go get a pen the cuter girl at the table we were talking to asked him if he knew any hot guys he could introduce her friend to. He seemed insulted by this as if she was insinuating that he wasn't hot. My friend then complained that all the girls like me because of the accent and looks. It's nonsense quite a few were interested in him.

We hit a club next. People were waiting in line but I just went up to the hostess and in english said what do we need to get in. She said ID which we gave her and she let us in straight away. hehe. We opened up a set of three french girls. Two of them were very cute and the one in the middle less so (although she had a great body). Again I used the i love you sms but their english wasn't so good so they didn't quite understand. We were standing at the corner of the bar and they were sitting around the corner so kind of in an L shape. I was at the corner with my friend on my right and next to me was a cute girl. Then was the middle one who spoke english and then the furthest away was another girl who was the hottest. Again I had little to say after the openers but we got a conversation going and I would say this was the best one. The furthest away girl though turned and spoke to some people behind us which sucked. The cuter girl of the remaining two didn't really understand what we were saying and she seemed shy. Eventually I said we don't we find a couch and they said sure but then when we went to sit only the middle ugliest one came with the other two stayed and started talking to two other guys. I was a little gutted. We sat with the one girl for a bit but it was two of us and neither of us were too interested. She was though and eventually asked if she can see us again. We gave her a number and said we are going to a club tomorrow so she can come. We said goodbye.

We went outside and there were these two very drunk americans. We chatted for a bit. The hotter of the two was girl coding her friend and I called them on it. We talked for a bit and they both busted me on having two buttons open on my shirt and called me metro. They also insulted me for wearing an Abercrombie shirt. I tried meekly to neg them back but they didn't really take much notice. We got onto age and they asked us how old we were. We said to guess and they guessed about right. They said how old are they and I said do you want me to guess high or low. She said just guess. Ok I said 31 (knowing obviously she wasnt). She looked insulted and i said oh ok I dunno 24? 23? Turns out they were 19. I thought perfect time to neg them and said oh they were too young for me bla bla bla. They said ok, bye then and turned to leave. My friend told me we threw them away. We sat for a second and watched two other guys hit on them but fail. We then followed after them and caught up with and started speaking again. We talked for a bit and found out the cuter one had some booty call/boyfriend guy that she was on the phone to. She got off the phone and we started talking. I made a playful comment about being mildly insulted about being called metro. they joked and I said you know its funny, when you have higher class cultures you always think they are gay. So they americans think the English are gay, the English think the French are etc. The cuter one then said 'wait, you are not higher class. Sorry. you are standing here with an abercrombie shirt with the button open showing your chest hair. I just cant stand here and say you are higher class. Sorry if that sounds bitch but I cant say that with a straight face." WOW. All I said back was 'wow you can dress them up but you can't take them anywhere.' My friend said wow, you girls are mean and we are so nice to which the other girl (not the one who insulted me but the nicer one) said you are nice (pointing to my friend) but he (pointing to me) not so nice. It was said with a smile but still blew me out.

She totally pissed on my strawberries. I was so insulted I didn't even say goodbye. I was done with them and just turned away and we got in a cab home.

The main problem I am having is from opening the sets to actually getting into a conversation. My stuff sounds too rehearses, too rigid, nothing deeper than an opener. And then I get totally stuck.I have no idea how to move the conversation on and how to DHV myself. When we got the one set to move, two of the girls didn't come with even though I said they should all come sit and they can bring their friends bla bla bla. Then, I don't know how to neg properly and then when insulted (which really hurt me) i dont know how to retort. The last set actually depressed me a little. We were happy and doing well and then BAM put me right in my place.

Ok first off good job putting yourself out there opening sets. That’s not always esay especially when your learning, but it’s the only way to do it.
Second: transitioning is in my opinion the hardest thing to do in running game. I can teach a monkey to go use the jealous girl friend opener its canned material and can be regurgitated at any point in time. This is why you have to have transitions. If you gave yourself a false time constraint in the opener and you get a few minutes of convo out of that opener, do a false take away stack to another opener. Get hem talking, create threads of conversation. You can always do the false take away and then ask “so how do yall all know each other” then build off of that.
As far as neging, if your going to neg girls they are going to give you sh1t back, especially American girls who are 19 years old! When they give it back to you just roll with it. Part of frame control is the cognitive reality loop which basically boils down to the way you look at the world. If a girl is giving you sh1t you can look at it as, hey she really doesn’t like me, or you can look at it as she may not like me now but she just doesn’t know me yet. Or she likes me and is just giving me token resistance. This is why I harp on inner game on this forum all the time, it relates back to everything you do in field. You have to be solid in yourself and not get all pissy when you catch a little sh1t from a HB. If you cant take her crap then how are you going to trigger her survival switch? You are going to look weak and low value in her eyes. And lower value we all know means no pick up.
If you really do offend them with the negging then simple apologize and say something like I was merely trying to find your limits, now I know them I wont cross them again. Negging can be tough, and tricky, but if done correctly it can work.
As for your dhv question, what kind of things are you doing for DHV?

Hey, thanks for the reply.

Your totally right about the inner game. I'm working on my own frame all the time. It did get me down a little because it was a real insult as opposed to a playful neg. I wont let it effect me in the future though. How do I come back from that? What do I reply?

I did do a false time constraint in the opener and did get a few minutes of it. Can you give me an example of a false take away stack to another opener though? I'm not sure what you mean by that.

Regarding DHVing that is another problem. Because I haven't got the transitioning down I haven't really even got there. But in the couple of conversations we did have I always have trouble DHVing. I've read quite a bit now and watched a few seminars. Mostly Mystery but Tyler Durden and DeAngelo as well. I've never understood Mystery's whole thing about DHVing. I mean how is a conversation supposed to go?:

Hey, girls really quick question. Who lies more?

*couple of minutes of talk*

Another opener

Transition

Hey, listen to this story about me. I work nearby a strip club and dated one of those girls for a bit and then I saved her bla bla bla?

It just seems like the story comes out of nowhere...

A false take away is also referred to as body rocking. Like you get your answer and are like cool and you turn to walk off, but then you turn back in and ask something else. I always ask how everyone knows each other. From there I build off their response. If I did my opener right they will bite on the question and open up just enough for me to find a conversation thread. Like if it’s a 2 set and they say they work together I might say something like, “I bet yall are nurses yall look like you would want to take care of people” and see what they say, even if I’m wrong it keeps them talking and most of the time if I’m wrong they will tell me what they really do. Then you can neg them about it and real them back in. Then of course the proper thing for them to do is ask you what you do and then your off and running, you can make some dhv up about your work or your passion. You just have to build on top of what you already have. Create a new conversation thread and work it.

As far as stacking, I consider an opener to be anything before the hook point. If you try to DVH or anything like that before the hook point its not going to work, so in return you stack to another opener. IE if you are using a canned opinion opener, you might stack to a situational opener. Its just about getting them to the hook point. Try not to over think it, just live in the moment and have fun.

As for how you move on well like it said take a look at the cognitive reality loop, your going to have to google it, its all about your out look on life. How you process your reality. If you learn to have a strong positive outlook you will move on no problem. If you are weak in you outlook its going to take you some tim. Heres the deal, when you are learning your going to get blown out, im still learning and get blown out, it happens. Learn from it, apply what you learn, and move on. Don’t wallow in your mistake and try to justify it, just move on.

GREAT advice!

Last night I was out again with the same mate. I was a little drunk so I had some more dutch courage but I feel I still could have done it sober. Anyway we walked into the bar and straight away I saw three girls sitting at a table I went over and did "is wearing makeup cheating routine?" They were mildly amused and then I pointed to the girl I liked and said are you wearinig? she said yeah so I said give me your hand and then I lightly slapped it saying that's for cheating. I then did a false takeaway like you said and then came back with how do you all know each other. One girl made the motion of oh we go waaay back and then I said oh you must all be nurses or something but it faded out cos of the music. My wingman who had been relatively silent up to this point suddenly pointed to the one who's hand I slapped and said no, no, she's a teacher. They were all like WOAH! She is! hehe we thought, lucky guess but I played it cool and said yeah she had that help the world look about her.

We carried on for a minute and they were really getting warmed up. They asked what the next one was and I said her? She's a lawyer. WOAAAAHH!!! She is!!! Yep, she has those greedy eyes I said. They were now really excited and the third one said ok what do I do? Two things at this point. A) I had no idea and didn't want to ruin a good run and b) we don't want to become performing monkeys so I said playfully oh no! I do NOT want to go there. I ain't touching that! They all laughed but I said hey, show me your hands and I did the whole middle finger longer than the forefinger routine. It was slightly off but we were truly at the hook point then anyway. However, my wingman busted it and said hey we are going to get a drink by the bar. Their faces went a little sad but my wingman wanted to Bounce and was tired anyway. Fair enough. I was well chuffed at the opening and transitioning anyway. I didn't get to dhv but we kind of did just by our conversation skills so... Anyway, thanks for the advice!

Sounds like you were totaly locked it. Great job keep it up.

Also next time your inset and locked in and your wingman is about to bail tell him to suck it up. 10-20 minutes us pleanty for a Number Close. You should hae had one there.

Anyways good job glad it worked for you, Anything else?