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  • 2 Post By SiliconMagician

Thread: Escalating, Escalation

  1. #1
    Playa's Avatar
    Playa is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Escalating, Escalation

    Escalation is when you push the previous boundaries with a woman. For example, let's say you are lightly touching her arm... if you want to start escalating the Kino - you may start slightly stroking her arm.

    Escalation is key to generating attraction and is best used after you have generated enough rapport and she is comfortable with you.

  2. #2
    gdayclose8 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Escalating, Escalation

    Hi Playa, I had a question with escalation.

    I'm good at opening women up, without much Approach Anxiety, but i always get stuck on where to go from there. I find that opening with relation to her clothing, such as shoes, is an easy way to get her interested in conversation, but where to go from there?

  3. #3
    SiliconMagician's Avatar
    SiliconMagician is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Escalating, Escalation

    Think about it this way man.

    Women are virtually entirely driven by emotional stimuli. They are incapable of any form of logical thought when interacting with a potential mate. Everything is about how you make them feel.

    So every action you take, every touch, every dhv story, every joke, must be attuned to this immutable rule of seduction. Everything must invoke the most positive and uplifting emotional response that you can get. Think of it as an equation:

    Demonstration of Higher Value + Positive Emotional Stimuli + Kino Escalation = Rise in Buying Temperature

    You know how women say that they know within the first 30 seconds or so of conversation whether a male is a possible candidate for sexual interaction? It is absolutely true. Your job as the male is to discover within that first 30 seconds whether she sees you as a potential candidate for sexual interaction. The eyes are the windows to the soul. Did they light up when you appeared? Also pay attention to the way she smiles. Does she run her fingers slowly through her hair or flip it? These are all signals of attraction that every female puts out within the first 60 seconds of an interaction.

    Some guys will push through but typically if I can't elicit one of these IOI's within the first 3-4 minutes of conversation I bow out of the set because it makes little sense to me to waste time trying to force IOI's from an otherwise unwilling female when there are plenty of other options flitting around the venue.

    So, lets assume that you have established an initial attraction. What comes next? Well that is a good question but typically my first goal is to get her to laugh as soon as possible and when I get that laugh, immediately fire up the kino and touch her. You should be touching her in a socially acceptable way within the first 1-3 minutes of conversation. This will lock you in and give you a solid standing in her eyes to remain a part of her reality.

    What comes next is a huge open ended question because no two conversations are alike. While we can draw some general conclusions and predictions of how a woman may react based on past experience and our knowledge of female instinct, we cannot just lay out a definite pattern.

    Mostly, you want to develop a line of questioning that feeds itself into a self sustaining loop. Lets take your opening example:

    PUA:"Hey there! How's it going tonight?"

    Female:"Good"

    PUA:"Having fun?"

    Female:"oh yes, having a blast!"

    PUA:"Excellent! I just wanted a take a quick minute and make my way over here because I noticed those awesome shoes you are wearing."

    Female:"Aww! Thank you!"

    PUA:"No problem, is there any reason why you chose this particular pair tonight?"

    Female (Shrug)"I just thought they looked nice."

    PUA:"Well, you made a good choice tonight that's for sure. They really compliment the rest of your outfit. You know, that reminds me of something I was thinking about the other day. You know how most men always wonder why a woman has to have so many shoes? I used to be the same way, before I started getting into fashion. Then I realized that you really need a pair of shoes to match every outfit, and when you have lots of outfits, you obviously need lots of shoes. Were there any other pairs you had in your closet you were thinking about wearing?"

    Female:"I do have another pair, blah blah blah"

    PUA:"Hey since we're on the subject of wardrobes. I bet you have a huge walk in closet don't you?"

    Female (sly smile)"Yes. I do actually"

    PUA:"Do you keep it organized or messy?"

    Female (laugh, you kino her):"Actually my closet is a big mess."

    PUA:"Oh? Would you describe yourself as a messy person? You aren't a slob are you?(qualifier)"

    Female:"Well, I've been accused of it once or twice. My friends say blah blah blah"

    Do you see where this is going? There are certain topics that you can almost never go wrong with and can always lead to the next question. Fashion is one of these. Once you have conversationally explored her closet, you can move to her dressers. What does she keep there typically? Conversationally guide her around her own bedroom, asking pertinent questions on why she made certain decisions that she did, and use these to elicit positive emotional responses and as hooks for the next line of questioning. Then you can bust on her and carry into the next conversational theme:

    PUA:"yeah right! I bet you have a huge Justin Beiber poster on your wall!"

    Female: (smirks):"No way, I'm not a fan of him."

    PUA:"Oh? So what kind of music do you like?"

    Each question led to the next one.

    Alternatively I have used this topic as a neg as well when a girl is making an obvious fashion faux pas like wearing red shoes that clash with the color of the rest of her outfit.

    PUA(neg response):"Hon, I just wanted to take a quick minute and make my way over here because I wanted to tell you that I just love the outfit you are wearing, but those shoes gotta go!"

    Female (neg response):"Why do you say that?"

    PUA (you better be tightly dressed and match exactly to pull this off!)"Well, obviously you can see that I'm a man who appreciates great fashion, and while your outfit matches perfectly, the color of your shoes clashes with the rest of your outfit. Is there any particular reason you chose them?"

    Female (pouting)"I think they look nice! This is my favorite pair!"

    PUA:"Hmph. Are they comfortable at least?"

    Strong neg? Yes. Very strong. Ballsy even, but these are the kinds of quality of negs that really put you out there as an alpha male who speaks his mind bluntly without fear of reproach.

    Basically, point out something situationally interesting, make a comment, ask her opinion, then comment on her opinion, then ask another question is the general pattern we are shooting for here while always looking for an opportunity to demonstrate higher value.
    Last edited by SiliconMagician; 04-03-2012 at 08:17 AM.

  4. #4
    gdayclose8 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Escalating, Escalation

    magician, thanks for the help, was fantastic.

    I figured i might try and pick your brain some more here - what are some good dhv stories that you have lined up? I find that with dhv stories there is a fine line between DHVing, and bragging - how does one maintain this balance? Some good stories/topics to use would be much appreciated!

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Escalating, Escalation

    great article man! thanks for making our lives much easier.

  6. #6
    Silverthunder is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Escalating, Escalation

    What's a good way to learn about fashion? Fashion for either sex, that is. I am totally clueless on this topic.

  7. #7
    gintama123456789 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default bestfriend

    hi can u help me about my best friend how can i and her become friends again i did a freaking mistake by saying that i like her plss help me
    plsss help me btw its been a year since that happened

  8. #8
    Rod27 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Escalating, Escalation

    Sry bro but this fashion conversation like it is put here would not work in Miami, especially on approach. The concept and fundamentals are great however.

  9. #9
    selasi is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Escalating, Escalation

    i get what you are saying but i always seem to escalate too quickly or play it too safe and get friendzoned. i have no problem with opening or getting the interest of girls but after the first or second date i ran out things to do and so i cant close. need some help

  10. #10
    thoneydo1 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Escalating, Escalation

    I aiways found it useful to lightly rub their hand while talking for couple seconds. If they pull away so be it. If not then escalate more few moments later each Kino Escalation is upwards to more, no grabby, gropping, just light Kino


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